by Sassafras

Created on: May 25, 2008   Last Updated: May 28, 2008

Not so long ago social phobia was simply called shyness, but when psychiatrists, seduced by the siren song of Big Pharma, decided they wanted to make money off shy people by peddling drugs to them that allegedly treat this "disorder", they arranged to have shyness relabeled as "social phobia" in the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders), the shrink's bible.

The main thing to remember about shyness, now officially termed "social phobia", is that despite what the experts claim, it's a normal personality variant. Not everyone is eager to be in the company of her fellow humans or feels comfortable when she finds herself in a social situation. That's nothing to be ashamed of, to worry about, or to treat with toxic drugs. Actually, it's a very rational and self-protective reaction to a challenging and potentially risky circumstance.

I used to be terribly self-conscious around others and tried to behave in a manner that I imagined would win their approval. I even stupidly took the alcohol cure because I was so ashamed of my inability to deal with social situations and believed that being high would make me act "normal". But I eventually discovered that the most effective way to conquer shyness is to realize that everyone is in the same boat, that absolutely nobody is worthy of your social fears, and that at the end of the day, it really doesn't matter what others think about you. What's important is what you think of yourself. Nurture independence of spirit. Be true to yourself and your own uniqueness. All good things flow from healthy self-esteem. You may never learn to like being social, but you will have learned how to deal with it.

In a postmodern world in which it's considered the norm for not just adults but even young kids to be given daily drugs to control hyperactivity, rebelliousness, anxiety, depression, anger and other unacceptable behaviors in the pursuit of social sameness, social phobia is just one more "disorder" that has been assigned its complement of pharmaceutical "cures". The trend in psychiatry seems to be to make everyone behave in a certain way and never deviate from that thanks to the questionable and pricey assistance of prescription drugs.

Having survived my own shyness aka social phobia, I find myself feeling sorry for people who have what I call social obsession, which is a mental disorder I would like to suggest to those endlessly creative DSM categorizers. Social obsession causes you to feel uncomfortable and unreal unless you're constantly around people willing to affirm your existence and worth. That, to me, is a mental disorder worthy of the DSM!

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