by eugenie

Created on: May 20, 2008   Last Updated: November 22, 2008

When I was sixteen I met someone who would terriosed me and change my whole life., but when I was twenty seven I met the man who terriosed me even worse. I was very much with my Mother all the time, I was very shy and never had been out with a boy. A friend of hers asked could I go with them to a ceili. I can't say I really wanted to go but my Mother it was ok and I would enjoy it so off I went.

Off to meet the man who would change my feelings about myself and who to trust for the rest of my life. I was walking on air when I came back so excited I felt different. We continued to meet on a regular basis which was not really what my Mother wanted as I began to stay out really late one night not coming home at all. I never was intimate with anyone till I met him. He made me feel amazing and when we made love for the first time I felt like a woman. I felt different when I went home and my Mother was speaking to me, she was talking but I couldnt hear a word, my mind was somewhere else. All I could think about was him and going over every second in my mind. Smiling for nothing when i recalled something he said or did. i felt different.. I felt like a woman. You could not get any condoms in the pharmacies at that time and even if you did your parents would know It never occurred to me that I might get pregnant but I did. I was naive and pregnant. I kept it secret for five months pretending it was not not happening to me. I broke down when my Mother asked me and the disappointment I saw in her face will stay with me forever. My Father who she was afraid to tell was very calm about it all saying we would deal with it and we did.

Our relationship over the next year was not plain sailing and when I went into hospital I went in alone. He had gone out drinking with his mates and seemed not to be really interested at all in the fact that he would be a Father soon. I had a very traumatic labour and my son was breech and I delivered him after 16 hours. When I saw my son for the first time I told him I would love him forever. He was so beautiful and mine. The next day he arrived to see him and still seemed disinterested then. I saw all this but I blanked in my mind. I did not want to believe he felt little for me. I should have seen the warning signs but I was so young and I didnt want to be rejected. I did not want to believe it.. I went back to school but its not what i wanted i wanted my baby and my man. BIG MISTAKE!

We married. Fantastic day was had by all till the end

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• Next Page >>