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About a month ago, some boys in my neighborhood broke out the back window of my car. I've been meaning to get it fixed, but it's the holiday season and money seems to disappear. In the mean time, I've removed all the broken glass and covered the gaping hole with a clear trash bag. Well, last week as I was driving home, I noticed red and blue flashing lights in my side mirror.

"Great," I said to myself. "This guy's going to tell me my make-shift window isn't going to cut it." I fumbled through the glove box and extracted the registration and insurance just as the officer appeared at my window.

I prepared myself by taking a deep breath and putting on a smile that would give any movie star a run for their money. "Good afternoon, sir," I said. "Is there a problem?"

The officer hunkered down to my level, leaned one arm above the window, and asked pleasantly, and completely straight-faced, "Ma'am, did you know that your window is broken?"

Long, dramatic pause.

A list of inappropriate responses flashed through my mind.
No...no, I had no idea! I'm so glad you told me! (Turn frantically to make sure it really is broken.)
You pulled me over for THAT? (Raise one eyebrow and stare him down.)
Oh, that...yes, I've been meaning to get it fixed but I don't have a big, strong man like you around to help me...(use bedroom voice, bat eyelashes, show a little cleavage.)
Yes. (Point and laugh at the officer.)

After a moment, I had collected myself. "Um...yeah, I know." I answered.

The officer nodded, and ran my information. He sent me on my way with a hearty "Happy Holidays, ma'am, and get that window repaired before it gets too cold!"

Thank you, officer, for making my holiday season just a little sillier.

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