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I was the product of rape(my mother tells me). Growing up I never really thought about a father, but as I remember at age twelve my mother told me that I had a father and that he lived in a neighboring town. I was such an inquisitive child and took it upon myself to find my father. I remember calling him early in the morning one day before school, and talked to him briefly. Everyday I would call him in the morning before school. Finally one day I decided to confront him about me being his daughter, he never denied it nor told me it was true. So then he started meeting me for lunch, he would take me to a fast food place and we would eat, and talk, then he would take me back to school and he would give me five dollars(maybe he was just trying to buy my love, I don't know). My mother finally found out that I had contacted my father,and she was very angry with me for finding him and talking with him. She sat me down and told me that soon after she found out that she was pregnant she tried to contact him and she told me that he handed her a five dollar bill and told her that if she couldn't get rid of it to pretend that she didn't ever know him. Hearing those words were very hurtful to me, but I never asked my father if that was true.We continued to see each other for lunch up until my second year of high school, then we just didn't see each other anymore until I was age twenty-one and had decided to marry. I brought my soon to be husband to my dads home, for him to meet my father. I remember my father was bar-b-queuing that day. You see my father was married and had other children. His other children didn't know about me but his wife did. My father told me while I was at his home that never to call him for money after I get married, I remember telling him that I had never asked him for anything in the time that I had known him, and why would I ask for anything in the future( he was sarcastic so I decided to be the same way with him), soon my soon to be husband and I left, and again I was hurt. My next encounter with my father was on the phone, when I was still at the hospital from giving birth to my first born, my father lived a mile and a half away from the hospital that we were at, I asked him to come see his grand daughter, he said he would, but he never did.The next time I seen my father I was at the grocery store with my daughter in the punkin seat and he finally seen his first grandchild(which he didn't seem too impressed by seeing her) he was more interested in talking about his failed marriage. The next time I hear about my father is when I heard the he had passed away. Within the past three years my mother had told me that my father had raped her and that I was the product of the rape. The one thing that bothers me and has been bothering me for the longest time is that I never had the chance to really know my father or my grandparents on his side( health issues or anything), it sure would have been nice to have know them.

Learn more about this author, Ronetta Cherry.
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