by Joy Elliot

Created on: May 19, 2008

Does God exist? O, I sure as heck hope so! I am so tired of having to fight all my battles alone!

If God exists, then why does He let all my friends and family roll their eyes at me every time I open my mouth to ask another one of my questions? Sure I went to church when I was little...Who didn't? But what kind of a God gets His feelings all hurt when a kid asks questions about belief?

On the other hand, maybe God really is Who He says He is, and all the people that lead His churches don't really have a clue about Who God is? But then again what kind of slip-shod organization is it when the founder can't consistently find good help?

Hey! Wait a minute! Maybe that's the bright idea Jesus had when He taught such a random group of men for three years before He left it to them! If His salvation thing was so fool-proof, maybe no matter how many screw-ups there are that try to serve Him throughout the centuries, He's going to win anyway!

Is that possible? Human stuff sure doesn't work that way! Wow! I almost get it, then I don't...it seems to work out for a minute, then POOF! It's gone!

Why can't I see it? Why does faith have to be so hard? Aaaauuuuugh! :[

God, do you exist? Why won't you show yourself?

What? Where did THAT thought come from? "My Parents taught me about God"? That can't be right! My parents don't even know God! O, they wore the mask alright...Church every Sunday, Happy smiles while at church/Fights and cussing at home!

When I was a kid, my parents were too busy living their own lives to care about me! If they taught me anything about God, they taught me that God doesn't really exist, or else if He (or She) does exist, God is too busy to care about me!

Why do people bring children into the world, if they aren't going to take time with them to show that they care for the child, love the child,...NEED the child.

For THAT matter, God, why do You help them to bring the child in to the world? You're supposedly the Creator! They said you made me,...but WHY?

Where were You, God? How in the heck did they really teach me anything about You! :[

Maybe THAT is the point! They didn't actually teach me about Who You really are! But the way they lived in front of me colored my ideas about You, the over-grown Parent!

God, I really want to believe You're real, because I need a little hope right now! Not to mention the fact that I need to know that some day all the secret hurts and abuse of the past will be remembered with Justice served!

FORGIVE? What's THAT got to do with God?

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