by MC Williams

Created on: May 19, 2008

This was a decision we were faced with, with my own son. We were stressed out, overwhelmed and confused. But, and it was a big but, we had no choice but to make the decision. We spent several days with the principal, teachers, evaluators, IQ tests and whatever else we could think of to help us make the best decision. My fianc at the time (he's passed since) and myself sat down with my son and we explained to him about the talks and tests and why were doing all the things we were doing to him, and he was great about it all.

In the end, all the evaluators decided my son hadn't gotten the full benefit of Kindergarten. The Kindergarten was for 4 hours a day in the morning (half-day they call it, I won't get on my soap box on how much I think half-day is insane). I knew my son wasn't doing good, when I met with his teacher and all she could say was how great he was and how nice he was and how all the kids thought he was great too. Nothing about his work, she said things would come to him one day. I ask to let him repeat Kindergarten and I was told "No, we don't do that because there isn't enough room." So my son was passed on and he struggled.

So we pressed on and then decision time came for all of us, would he repeat a grade level? My son was in the decision process the entire way and when it came time to tell the school of our decision we had my son there. The administrators and teachers thought he should be out of the room and we were a little offended, so I explained to them (I didn't have the best tone I admit now), "Well he is staying, after all he is the one that has to repeat the grade and deal with his peers knowing that he failed. He stays, deal with it." Okay, I know it was harsh, but it was how I felt about it.

My son, and I mean him, decided he should repeat since he didn't feel he could read aloud every word in a story if he was called on to read. He told us he got nervous reading in front of the other kids so he would stay in his class and try harder.

In the end, repeating was best for my son. Don't take the decision lightly if you have to make it. Get informed and listen to the teachers and administrators. Don't base a decision on people telling you how hard other kids will make his/her life. Kids that struggle and parents ignore it because of embarrassment or whatever reason there is, always struggle. So, do what is best for your child. In the end you may just see a more confident child, I know I do.

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