by Marie Davis

Created on: May 16, 2008

A faint breeze stirred the moist air as "John" and I strolled down the street. We'd originally met on an Internet dating site and become acquainted through chat, e-mails, and phone calls. We discovered we lived in the same town, so we decided to meet for an evening walk. I liked his witty, astute conversation, his sense of humor, and his friendly smile. I thought he liked me, too, until he made the fatal remark.

"You're not at all like I expected," he said, flashing a charming grin as we sauntered down Main Street.

"Oh, really? How so?" I asked.

"You're not...needy and desperate," he replied. " You're not even fat. When I heard you had six children, I got this mental image..." he shrugged.

I raised one eyebrow, biting my tongue until something more appropriate than, "Out of my sight, you chauvinistic fool!" could cross my lips. I really didn't know what to say after that; what I did know was that the "date" was most definitely at an end.

Today, there are a record number of single parents out there in the dating pool (mostly due to the fact that half of all marriages end in divorce). It has become so commonplace that logic would dictate the emergence of some type of socially understood dating protocol that would, mercifully, make the whole process a bit easier for those of us who are, as one former boyfriend put it, "a package deal." Unfortunately, no such event has occurred. I, however, after six years in the "shark pool," eventually made it out-and into that coveted state of wedlocked bliss with a man who has three children of his own. In the hope that my accumulated wisdom may spare some other women the battle wounds I suffered, I present my unofficial rules for dating as a single parent.

1.Avoid trolling for dates in the worst places: the Internet, bars, and any singles' event. The Internet is full of people pretending to be someone they aren't, the singles' events are full of people looking for someone they're not, and the bars are full of people who are trying to get drunk enough not to know the difference. Worse, all of those people are only there because they couldn't get dates.

2.Throw away "the list." You know the one I mean; Prince Charming with a red BMW, etc. etc. It's back to basics: does he have teeth and a job? I met my husband, who is a thoroughly terrific guy, only after I abandoned the requirement that my chosen had to be involved in the arts, had to be witty and outgoing, etc. Guess what? He wears cowboy boots and goes hunting, doesn't like

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