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Overcoming "writer's block" for academic writing

by Trent Lorcher

Remember that time you had an essay due on Wednesday and instead of writing it the week before, you watched Knight Rider reruns and played Tetris? Remember on Tuesday night when you couldn't think of anything to write and you threw your laptop out the window in frustration? Don't let it happen again. Do the following for overcoming writer's block:

RELAX

Writer's block is easy to overcome. If I could just remember how, I would tell you. I need to relax right now. That's it! Relax, but not too much because you might fall asleep and where would that leave you? Probably on the floor, or slouched over in a chair.

I thought of another way writer's block can be overcome: relax so much that you fall forward and smash your head against the keyboard. Let's try it! Y7hujhdxz. OK, that didn't work.

WRITE

Let me give you a recap of what we've come up with so far: 1) relax, but not too much because smashing your head on the computer keyboard, not only hurts, it creates incoherent words like "kujhiym"; 2) I'm actually working on number two. I have it somewhere in the depths of my soul, but I think it's blocked.

While I'm trying to come up with number two, I'll keep writing. That's it! Keep writing. You'll think of something. You may have to do some major deleting afterward, but once that block is gone, it won't matter (editor's note: this particular writing task was originally 857 pages).

PREWRITE

Before writing, brainstorm and outline. Once you begin, you'll have a framework from which to work. For instance, on this assignment, instead of coming up with a thesis statement and major ideas, I simply sat down and started writing.

What I should have done was create a list and then organized it. For example, How to overcome writer's block for academic writing: (1) relax (but not too much); (2) keep writing even if you're blocked; (3) brainstorm and make an outline.

START OVER

If I'd have outlined properly, I would have listed more than three ways to overcome writer's block for academic writing. I just can't think of any more right now. I suppose I could start over, brainstorm, and create an outline, but I'd rather continue writing (in a relaxed manner) and see what comes up.

Nothing yet, but I'll let you know.

Still waiting.

Hang in there.

I had to delete 34 pages, but I just thought of something spectacular.

VISUALIZATION

It sounds corny, but it works. Here's how you do it:

(1) close your eyes (after you finish reading all the steps); (2) visualize yourself happily typing away, the more detailed the better. Imagine yourself smiling while looking at a screen full of words or visualize yourself in the nude with your favorite Greek and Latin Roots; 3) if you feel yourself tense, visualize a knot untying; 4) visualize different types of releasing: steam coming out, oil gushing, and anything else that involves the releasing of pressure or undoing of tangles.

ELIMINATE DISTRACTIONS

Assuming you haven't crushed your monitor with a meat tenderizer or gone Romeo and Juliet at the town morgue, there's one more thing you may want to try. I just can't think of it. Hold on. I need to shut my window; there's a car alarm going off. And while I'm up, I suppose I could turn off the radio and the TV, and ask my brother-in-law to turn off the jackhammer that he's using to break up the tile in the kitchen.

All right I'm back and I've got great news. I thought of the final suggestion for overcoming writer's block: eliminate external distractions. Writer's block, be gone!

If none of these suggestions work, get a hammer and shatter the keyboard.

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