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Reflections: On being middle-aged

by MJ Sharpe

Created on: May 10, 2008

Often heard is the adage, "age is but a number." Those who are fortunate enough to reach middle-age may have the thought even more than others that age is but a number. What they may realize is the mind does not make the distinction of how many birthdays one has. When considered relatively, age is but a measurement of time and we behave according to the dictates of our minds. So if we are dictating to ourselves that we are old then ok, we are old. At the same time, if its felt 50 years of age is 25 then that is the display. Take for example the "old dude" in the sporty car with the top down or the grandmother who still wants to show her legs in the short skirt. Who says the way they see themselves is wrong? There in lies the error; external critics say so.

Few people will go against the mores of their society as a matter of fitting into the democracy that keeps a society cohesive. So while aging on into middle age thoughts are that all those in that category are to move out of the way and make way for the young folks. How sad is this?

Too often views of middle aged men and women are that they are too old for certain activities as if they suddenly became too stupid to do it anymore. They are labeled "spry" if they express themselves as being full of life or "spunky" if they want to drive around in a sporty vehicle or wear the short skirt. When internally they are just whom they think are: people participating in life and enjoying it on their own terms.

Of late we have seen that the external critics are changing their attitudes by accepting the way middle aged and older adults relate to themselves. There is a popular television commercial which addresses age in part by stating, "30 is the new 20 and 40 the new 30" This is only one example -but there are many- and the point is, the critics are beginning to accept the "middle aged" or older adults' way of being.

Middle aged women are no longer just the "nanny-granny" for younger women and older men are no longer just the "cool old dude" from down the street. They are individuals' still loving life, still planning their futures, still dating, still being in love, still hoping for changes in their lives, still voting, still caring and still doing their own thing and not waiting for time or another birthday.

Those who are not waiting for time are enjoying their lives; they explore the newness of evolution ecstatically, emotionally, cerebrally and technologically (to name a few ways). Their emphasis is on who they are not who anyone else view them to be. In this exploration they discover satisfaction knowing that they were true to the character of self. This confidence in self reinvents their reliability; it reassures their sense of worth while it creates a clear view of how they want to live out the rest of their lives.

Aged presidents and astronauts accepted in their unique positions as being able to carry out their duties to self and others should be the same for the rest of us in our alignment with age. Yes some will say the physical body can't always agree with the mind in life's undertaking and that is true, however, the internal clock is such that it clues the individual to what can and cannot be, or what should and should not be. If the mind does not give the clue the bones and flesh definitely will. The strength and dignity of it all rests there.

Age really is a number, middle age a greater number but it is as with everything else a point of view of the individual. You can be middle age or you can be one who loves life and move right along.

It's your choice.

Learn more about this author, MJ Sharpe.
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