Misspelling a word is a mistake, forgetting to bring in much needed paperwork is a mistake, throwing on mis-matched socks as you run out the door is a mistake, falling into bed with another person is not.

Any affair stems from something that is lacking at home, be it; passion, attention or love. The person having the affair has a need for something that their partner is not willing, able or informed to provide. Many couples who have experienced an affair will tell you that life at home was just not cutting it. Perhaps there was not enough romance or there was a lack of sex in the relationship, perhaps the other partner was very busy and work consumed all their time, whatever the case something was lacking causing one partner to fill that void elsewhere.

Many times the affected partner is not even aware that the person having the affair is unhappy this is why communication in a relationship is so important. It is human nature to please people. So by telling your partner what you need they will naturally feel the need to provide it for you, to please you so to speak.

Although a person who has had an affair may feel that it is a mistake, especially after the fact, the choice to proceed with it was made for a reason. This is not implying that it was a good decision to make, but it was a decision just the same, the person had a choice. It may have been a poor choice and it may have ended up being a mistake, but it was a choice in the first place the person was not forced into a decision without knowing the consequences.

The best choice in any relationship when facing issues is to discuss them and save yourself the heartache down the road. If after discussing your needs your partner is still not willing to provide you with the thing that your require, it is best to take a long look at your relationship and decide if it is beneficial for you, but lying and cheating will not make you happy, they will only make things worse in the future.

Counceling is the best path to take in any relationship where infidelity has been present or a lurking threat, remember that you chose to be with this person, you decided that you love this person and although at times love may be difficult, an affair will be even more so.

This sitatuion can be devestating for the person affected by an affair, they will likley have feelings of insecurity and many time they will blame themselves, this is not the case. The person having the affair is not to blame either, but they did have a choice to share their feelings with their partner. Blam will only lead to deeper resentment and will not improve on the issues that are a part of the relationship in question.

Mistakes come in many forms, but one thing is always certin, you never know you have made a mistake until you have made the choice to make it.

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