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Suffering is an entirely subjective phenomenon in humanity. People interpret suffering from a point of personal perspective based on experience, which is then deemed as either good or bad. Behind these two categories of experience is ego-supported desire and attachment.

When one wants something, but cannot have it, it is bad. When one does not want something and it comes anyway, it is bad. When one gets what one wants, it is good. When what one does not want does not come, it is good. If only life would cooperate with these four simple rules of the ego, there would be no suffering.

Attachment to things (objects, wealth, relationships, status) is a further cause of suffering. Attachment is the desire to keep forever those things that are seen as precious, sentimental or self-fulfilling. The very desire to hold on to things, however, unleashes fear of loss, so the very things that are seen as good and desirous simultaneously cause suffering.

The antidote to desire and attachment is acceptance and understanding the concept of impermanence. When one accepts things just as they are and knows that they will come to pass, suffering diminishes considerable, if not completely. The bible tells us that to everything there is a season. The Buddha taught that everything that arises also passes. The lesson here is not only to appreciate and be grateful for the good things in life, but to know when to let them go. Likewise, facing the problems that inevitably come along with grace and dignity, knowing that they will not last forever, makes the burden much easier to bear.

So, why do bad things happen at all? Why do people murder, torture and abuse each other? Are we supposed to just accept such atrocious acts and blithely wave our hands in the air as if to say, "They will pass. No need to concern ourselves with them." What about disease, famine and natural disasters? Are we supposed to turn a blind eye? Not at all! Problems and difficulties are not to be ignored. The point is that just wanting them not to happen and bemoaning them when they do does not prevent them, nor does it make them go away. How we respond to things that happen is what makes the difference.

The so-called negative emotions that people experience are perfectly normal. Anger, sadness, guilt and fear happen to everyone. They are not pleasant and they can be quite destructive, but they do not have to become suffering. Emotions, good and bad, are gauges of how things are going for us mentally and spiritually. When anger arises, for example, people can either allow it to run amok or they can stop and thoughtfully examine what is really going on. There is a great deal of powerful energy behind anger; it can cause suffering or it can be used to do good. The same principle applies to positive emotions. Love, for instance, should it become obsessive or possessive, is not agreeable at all. It is a source of suffering.

To really understand why there is suffering in the world, people need to look inside and closely examine those habits and patterns of behaviour that cause suffering for them. Suffering begins and ends at the level of the individual.

Learn more about this author, Toni McKilligan.
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