by LB

Created on: May 06, 2008   Last Updated: May 20, 2008

The cycle begins every new year. A resolution is made to make this year "The Year". The year of the new you, the thinner you, the happier you. You make an unrealistic goal to lose thirty or fifty pounds by summer and are disappointed in yourself when you don't meet that goal. It leaves you bitter and self-conscious and wishing for colder weather where you can hide under bulkier clothes. Every outdoor activity begins with a dreaded trip through your closet in search of something that will hide your chunky thighs, flabby arms, and your bulky belly. You often wear something to warm for the weather and don't enjoy being outside.

I know exactly how you feel because I went through this every year until this year. This year was different because I stopped caring about how I looked and started to focus on how I felt. Here are a few tricks I learned to live a stress-free, happier summer.

1. Take a good look at you goals.
Running four miles a day when you've been mostly a couch potato is not realistic, but going for a walk every evening is. Set you goals at an achievable level that way you won't suffer a blow to your self-esteem when it doesn't work out.

2. Change your focus.
Try feeling good instead of looking good. Stop spending so much time obsessing about how you look. I know this is easier said than done so start small. Limit yourself to one minute in front of the mirror. Spend 10 minutes doing simple stretches. Touch your toes. Wiggle them. Focus on something beside your reflection.

3. Get back to nature.
Even if you live in a big city, nature is all around you. Look at the trees, smell the flowers, listen to the birds. Breathe in the beauty of nature and let it fill you up.Take a few moments to meditate. Pretty soon you'll be so focused on the beauty around you that you won't have time to dwell on how you look.

4. Dress for fun.
Don't try to cram your size 20 butt into a size 10 pair of shorts. It won't help you and will only make you feel worse about yourself. If what you wear isn't working for you try something different. If you wear mostly jeans and t-shirts try wearing a long billowy dress. Avoid synthetic fabrics and unflattering styles (i.e. the mu-mu). Wear light colors or if you love black,like me,wear black pants or capris and pair it with a lighter color on top. It will draw attention away from your bottom half and pull focus to your face. If you're really reluctant to give up your jeans wear a tunic type top it will give you a fun, flirty look. Guys trade your trade your t-shirts for a cotton button down shirt or polo. It will clean up your style a little and give you a boost of confidence.

5. The dreaded swimsuit.
The only person who looks like Hiedi Klum in a swimsuit is Hiedi Klum. Remember, your main goal is to have fun not look good in a bathing suit. Be brave, jump in the water, get wet. You probably will still have that nagging little voice in your head criticizing how you look but don't let it overwhelm you.

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