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It sounds so simple, a word with just two letters, one tiny syllable, but it is one of the most difficult words we will ever learn to say with conviction. Think about how many times you have wanted to say it but didn't. Your head said NO, but your mouth said yes.

There are many reasons why we don't say the word NO when we want to. We might be afraid that we will hurt the feelings of a friend or family member, so we sacrifice our own feelings. Maybe we fear making someone angry, so we say yes and add more resentment and anger to our already heavy baggage. Sometimes, we say yes simply out of habit because we have become accustomed to being agreeable. We are taught from a very early age to be agreeable, and itis a hard habit to break. Many times, we say it because we feel bullied or pressured. Other times, we say it to avoid confrontation.

There are countless reasons why we agree to do things that we do not really want to do. But more important than figuring out why we do it is figuring out how to stop.

The following are simple, yet important things that we must learn so that we will be able to say NO when we want to without fear, guilt, or anxiety:

1. Our time is just as important as everyone else's.
2. We don't have any more time than anyone else. Everyone has the same 24 hours each day and 7 days each week.
3. Other people's responsibilities are not ours to take care of.
4. If someone gets angry because we say NO, that is not our problem. They might try to make it our problem, but we must not allow that.
5. Saying NO is healthier than piling up resentment which often happens when we say yes to everything.
6. If someone wants to challenge our right to say NO, we are free to walk away or stay and try to explain, whichever we choose.
7. Just because we had time to do someone a favor last week or last month doesn't mean that we have the time, or the desire, to do it this time.
8. We must begin to respect ourselves enough to do what feels right for us.
9. There is a difference in doing a favor for someone and letting someone take advantage of us. If we say yes all the time, we are increasing the chances that we will be taken for granted.
10. The choice to say NO is ours. If we say yes when we really want to say NO, it's our own fault, so we cannot blame anyone else.
11. Learning to say NO is one of the first steps in learning how to take proper care of ourselves, protect our sanity, and enjoy our lives more.

Learn more about this author, Kim Everett.
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