by Norma Budden

Created on: May 06, 2008

Giving Christian advice to teens is one of the best choices any adult, or parent, can make when guiding teens in their midst. Godly advice will never go astray. Even when teens don't always listen to such advice, the words remain with them as long as the teen sought the advice and didn't have it forced upon them.

Parent-teen relationships
When parents have close relationships with their teens, there is a greater likelihood that their teens will turn to them when in a crisis. Teens will know that, though their parents are busy with various responsibilities - including other children in the household - their parents will take the time to listen to them, and try to understand their situations or desires. They'll know their parents love them and want what's best for them.

On the other hand, there are other parent-teen relationships where it seems that "never the twain shall meet." They disagree on almost everything to the point there is more discord than bliss in their relationships. In such cases, teens will feel their parents don't care about their thoughts and feelings, and will begin to rebel against most authority figures in their lives.

The blame game
It's not always easy to give Christian advice to teens because they become defensive so easily. They are always pointing blame when life doesn't go the way they hoped. Too many teens blame God for the mess the world is in today. They blame God when a family member becomes sick or dies or when parents lose their jobs. Conversely, they blame themselves when their parents choose to separate or divorce. They believe that if they could have behaved better, their parents would have stayed together.

Gaining respect
Whatever teens are experiencing in life, gaining their respect is half the battle in being able to counsel them. Adults need to take the initiative and take time to understand what's going on in the minds of teens in their midst. To sit in front of teens and berate them for their feelings or emotions will alienate them.

Teens need someone who can listen to them without judging - people who can bite their tongues and remain quiet until teens have said what they needed to say. Adults who listen without interrupting will be shown the same courtesy and respect by teens; teens will listen to what they have to say.

When Christian advice is passed along to teens, teens like to understand why they should follow the advice. If the counselor's response to teens is, "Because I said so," teens won't respect the answer. However,

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