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Humor: How to procrastinate like a pro

by Abdullahi Dogo

Created on: May 06, 2008   Last Updated: October 06, 2009

I love tomorrows, I really do. You know why? Here, I'll tell you why.. tomorrow.

Hey I'm back. As I was saying yesterday, I love tomorrows. They are so convenient, they are almost assured, and the best thing about tomorrow is that there will always be another one, tomorrow. I don't understand why I have to do this today, when I can just as easily do it tomorrow, I mean right now there are better things I could be doing, like not letting my cable subscription go to waste. Or that really expensive water bed I got (it really did a number on my bottom line) I think it's a shame that it only gets to be used at night. Hey, why don't I remedy that and leave that other really important stuff that I have to do till tomorrow.

I am self employed, in a very lucrative line of business. I should be rolling in change, but the reality is that I make just enough money to stave off crippling debt. I could expand my business, create new products and services that I could sell. I have created, analyzed and even put finishing touches to my expansion plans mentally. Whenever I'm about to start the process of implementing said plans, something less important comes up. Less important, but somehow more pressing. So I proceed to shelve my developmental ideas for that certainty that is tomorrow, now if only that damned tomorrow would come. Did I mention that I loved tomorrows? Yeah? Well I'm mentioning it again.

I read a saying somewhere, "Never put off what you can do today, till tomorrow". I adhere to it diligently, my problem lies in differentiating between the things I can do today, and the things I should do today. The relative importance of activities is well, relative. Am I making any sense? Yes? No? No! What do you mean no. Okay, I will elaborate.tomorrow

Aaah! Another lovely day. So as I was saying six tomorrows ago, I can't decide what to do based on how pressing or important it is, because depending on the time of day, the relative humidity, and what's on TV, my classification of activities changes. As you might have gleamed off earlier, I have two broad distinctions of daily activities. There are the important ones, and there are the pressing ones. Naturally, the pressing activities take precedence over the important ones. That seems pretty straight forward, but it isn't. These classifications have a very dynamic interchangeability that I have no control over. What was pressing five minutes ago can without warning be relegated to important, and I act naturally.

Anyway I am in no particular rush to change. What I have going works, maybe barely, but it works. This leaves me with nothing more to say except "I love tomorrows".

Learn more about this author, Abdullahi Dogo.
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