by fairychild

Created on: May 03, 2008   Last Updated: October 31, 2008

As a single woman approaches her thirtieth birthday, feelings of fear, anguish and the unknown lay trapped beneath a mountain of questions and self-doubt.

It forces you to examine the past 29 years while THE question, what have accomplished? Screams at you.

You look at your friends and family comparing your life to theirs.

Your body changes and your soul yearns to stay attached to the adventure of your 20's. But your 20's are the most difficult time. You are unsure of yourself and your choices. But it's where you learn life's hardest lessons.

You learn your dearest friends are not the people that live the closest to you. You learn that they are pieces of your heart scattered around the world and when you're reunited, your heart is whole again.

And those people who you socialize with and experience new and exiting adventures with are just people filling those empty spaces in your heart. They're the starter, while your friends are a five-course meal, leaving you completely satisfied and hungry no more.

Your learn that it's okay not to have a husband, children or a significant other. It just means you're not ready yet. To have these things you must want them and be ready for those challenges. Your career is what you make of it. You learn that not everything comes your way and that you take what you've been handed, make the best of it and have fun.

You learn that most people are selfish, ignorant and uncaring. You learn that some people are selfless, giving completely of themselves and their time, asking for nothing in return.

In two weeks I will be thirty, a single woman who has lived a hard life with more downs than ups. But the downs have been a test of my character and strength. At times I though I would drown in the depths of sorrow and pain.

I found my way, through friends who were patient when I was selfish, who cried with me when my heart was breaking and who laughed with me till our sides ached.

I forgot who I was. My spirit was dying and 30 is my turning point. For too long I stayed in the shadows of my 20's. Now, I will bask in the sunlight of my 30's. It's a time to re-discover you. I'm graduating from my twenties with honors. I can be me and not care what others think because I have come this far.

And to welcome 30 into my life, my best friend and I are headed off to Brazil. Life is moving without me, it's time to jump back in and enjoy the ride.

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