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Don't ponder; just purchase. Ah, what a mantra. A friend of mine said that bumper sticker line to me, and it's stuck since then. However, many of us (yes, myself included) abide by the saying. Why think about a buying an item when you can just have it? It's so easy nowadays to spend, spend, spend. We are encouraged everywhere we go from "SALE!" signs to nation-wide Black Fridays to outlets to "bargain" stores. But what satisfaction do these purchases result? For how long? Hmmm.

Remember the "Hoarders" on Oprah? This couple had their entire family home filled with stuff. Yes, stuff that covered most of the square footage; stuffed that filled a enormous warehouse. Granted the accumulation was over many years, but an entire warehouse? When you think about it, though, the main difference between shopaholics and hoarders is that hoarders keep EVERYTHING. Imagine if you kept every item you bought: the items you've kept, donated to Goodwill, gave away to family and friends, etc. Mentally convert those items to closet space. Most of my items are kept in repression, blocked from my conscious mind. I'm not ready to deal with it yet. But when are we ever?

I have a few friends who are fellow shopaholics. (Remember the one who told me my opening line?) We've tried so many times within the past year (yes, I know it's only May) to budget, but to no avail purchases are made within days, hours even, of said budget constraints. Why is there always something you need to buy? I designated May 1, 2008, to be the start of my shopping-sabbatical. No more unnecessary purchases. But I depart on a trip the evening of May 2, 2008 from Honolulu to San Diego. When I looked up the weather forecast, I decided I needed a light cardigan just in case I got too cold. It's necessary, isn't it? I can't go around San Diego chilly. Somehow I ended up at Ala Moana mall and found myself in Banana Republic. I saw the perfect cardigan to go with the dress I bought (on April 29 - just a few to get it out of my system, like binging before a diet) and Yes! it was on sale at 30% off. Well, Banana Republic isn't exactly Steve & Barry's. 30% off still came out to $35, which is not bad considering how expensive most clothing stores are.

The only down side to shopping is balancing your accounts and facing how much money you've actually spent. I've made it a habit to do it weekly, if not daily, but urgently when I've gone on a spree. I, however, am anti-credit cards; strictly cash-basis. Smart yet dangerous. I know myself enough to not trust a credit card in my hands. I don't even want to think about that disaster.

I am afflicted by the shopping disorder. I feel that it's deserved to have nice things. Unfortunately, those nice things that I like are a bit indulgent. My eyes are attracted to pricey items, unbeknown to myself even. I could walk into a shoe store selling a range of shoes from $50 - $300, and I am more likely to be lured towards the upper, without looking at the price tag. But, of course, the more expensive shoes will be one of the most beautiful. But I digress. I've thought of hiring an accountant (too expensive), financial counselor (too strict) and enlisting the help of my friends (too easy to keep secrets from), but that moment quickly passed. I am fortunate enough that even with these shopping sprees, I live within my means. But it's always a nice thought to save, isn't it. Pay yourself first and all that. But most of us find budget-living an endless goal, so difficult to attain, so difficult to live by. It is for me, and I can sympathize with my fellow addicts.

Learn more about this author, Frances Babauta.
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