by Skyler Sage

Created on: May 02, 2008

The clock on the kitchen stove reads 2:38 in the afternoon

The "to do" list sits on her kitchen counter
Yes, there are so many things she "should" be doing
The list attempts to grab her attention

But instead
She lies immobilized
Once again lost
Lost
in The Void.

Her mind wanders in the empty stillness of late afternoon...
How can a woman who Has so much, who Does so much, who Is so much

Feel so lost in despair?
Where is her strength to fight off this clever and cunning enemy?

Fighting a losing battle against her formidable foe,
She recounts the activities of her day so far
A very good day, all in all

A day that should have protected her against
The Void:

4:30 a.m.
She is up before the light of day
Always thrilled when she arises before the birds begin their morning songs
And today, even up on the mountain
She can hear the surf break a mile below her
Seductive, beautiful, the allure of a south swell

Strong fresh-ground coffee and Djaram Lights her early morning companions
She feels at peace in the darkness, the quiet, the anticipation of a new day

This will be the day, she tells herself
That I will not long for him
This will be the day
That his memory will not haunt me at every empty moment
Today, she begs her God in vain,
May I find relief from the obsession
For just one full day
Is that so much to ask?

-

Arriving promptly at 6 a.m.
She meets her friends
And for the first time since she got her surf board in August of last year
She removes it from the top of her van and heads out into the water
Paddling paddling paddling
She makes her way down the coast to the cove - meant for beginners like herself

She feels the water below and around her
For the first time, she gets a sense of maneuvering a long board in the ocean
In, around, up, down, under the waves. Waiting, turning, paddling, falling, getting on again...
She finds herself responding intuitively - she is one with the ocean - it is as alive as she

Though still on her belly, she catches her first real wave
She feels the power of that wave whisking her miraculously to the shore
She now understands the rush, the thrill, the bliss of wave-riding.
Finally, she has arrived.

It is here that she acknowledges one of the first gifts of her tragic breakup:
She has finally begun her life-long goal of learning to surf

-

She returns home to call her realtor
(Yes, she really has her own realtor!)
Seeking new retail space after waiting 6 months
For permit delays that appear never-ending
Her realtor is committed to find an alternative space
For she is ready to open shop -
Ready

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>