by Merr Chandler

Created on: May 01, 2008

At one point or another, I've been on just about every diet on the books. I've done low fat, low calorie, and low carb. I've eaten nothing but cabbage soup for a week. I've had gym memberships, invested in popular aerobics programs, and tried training for a marathon. The scale became a friend and an enemy - it had the power to make or break my day. I've been over 200 lbs and under 100 lbs.

All this has taught me one thing - diets don't work. We're a culture that lives by extremes - super skinny super models and an obesity epidemic. We don't understand the concept of moderation. And moderation is the only thing that will end the weight loss struggle.

It took me a long time to figure this out. It was hard to convince myself that if I just ate a healthy diet, and let my body do it's own thing, it would settle at a normal weight. In the past, if I wasn't on a diet, the scale went up - if I was, it was down. How could I trust myself or my body to eat a normal healthy diet?

I developed a process. It was slow going - it's been two years since I gave up on dieting, and I'm still not perfect. My process involves eating consciously. It's about eating what you like to eat and not eating what you don't like to eat. I've developed lists of foods that aren't worth wasting calories on. I also have foods that are, and I make sure that I eat those!

For example, I hate carrots. I always saw carrots as "diet food" - so when I was on a diet, I'd eat them. If I wasn't, I avoided them like the plague. So now I don't eat them. I'm also not a big fan of eggs. Or waffles. I just don't care for them. I used to eat them - I'd go out with people, and everyone else would order eggs, so I would too. Now, when we go out to breakfast, I order the things I really like - hash browns and bacon.

The calories in an omelet are not worth it to me. But the calories in bacon and potatoes are. There are other high calorie foods I've stopped eating because I find they're not as good as their lower calorie counterparts, or that I can't really taste a difference. I don't like mayonnaise, so I don't eat it. I prefer wheat bread to white bread. I prefer pesto sauces to alfredo.

I've also learned to eat when I want. There's not much point in sitting and stuffing my face in front of the TV, something I used to do all the time before. I've started to ask myself whether or not I really want to eat something before I eat it, and a lot of times I find that I'm really after something else. A big thing for me is relaxation (which I can get calorie free sitting on the porch with my dog). If I really do want to eat, I will.

In doing this, I've managed to lose 30 lbs so far, although the going has been slow - 30 lbs over two years isn't much! But slow weight loss is the best, and the number is always going down, almost never up! I may never be at the low end of the appropriate weight for my height, but I've learned to be OK with that. I've got a large bone structure and I'm curvy.

So by giving up on dieting all together, I've become a lot more sure of myself, a lot happier, I never feel deprived, and I'm able to eat whatever I want. Isn't that worth slow progress and learning a little more about yourself?

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