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Humor: Drinking fountains

by Chris Simpson

Created on: May 01, 2008

Drinking fountains are what make the world go around. Everywhere you look there is always a free source of water nearby. Without this instant gratification, many more shoppers and mall walkers would be keeling over in their tracks. If you are ever in a store and get that insatiable urge that doesn't go away, just head for the restrooms, where a drinking fountain usually lies in wait just outside.

Now sure, there are plenty of other refreshment options available, such as fountain drinks, soda coolers, and sometimes even restaurants inside the stores where drinks can be purchased. But the operative word in that sentence is purchase. Why would anyone in their right minds purchase a drink when they could just walk over to the drinking fountain and be supplied with an endless supply of cool, refreshing water?

I honestly couldn't tell you how many times drinking fountains have saved my life. Many a long, hot summer day when I find myself wandering aimlessly around a mall, looking for that last source of hope-an oasis in the middle of a desert. And right before I'm about to give up all hope, it appears, sitting there like a statue in all its glory. I slowly meander over towards it, careful not to attract attention to myself. I watched it like an eagle eyes its prey. If anyone dared make a move for it, I would pounce. Of course, nobody did and I was able to quench that thirst until I was sure I would never thirst again.

Drinking fountains are often regarded as filthy germ machines to many people. This is simply not a possibility at all. Water is constantly pouring over them, cleaning them of any and all germs. Not to mention the wonderful cleaning staff who work so hard behind the scenes to make sure we all have the comfort of knowing that drinking fountains will always be there and ready to serve us.

With us humans and our desire for convenience, it won't be long before drinking fountains are eradicated and retired to dusty old museums. Please, don't let this happen. It is physically impossible for the modern shopper to go to a store and not use a drinking fountain. Don't let drinking fountains become a side-note on the story of our lives. Instead, let them be a learning tool for future generations. If you are interested in the future of drinking fountains, please call 1-800-DRINK-4U*




*Telephone number may lead to wild gorillas; for your own safety, do NOT call this number.

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