by Great Mind

Created on: April 30, 2008

Weather you employ corporal punishment or not, parents exist to give limits to children. As parents we all know that children thrive on testing the lines we draw, as well as the limits of their environment.
Our job is to use the best methods, result wise, to the situation and the demeanor of the child. Limits must be set not only for their safety, but for OUR sanity. We have all observed the unfortunate parent who tries to bring an undisciplined child out in public. The chaos that ensues is due to the lack behavioral limits set for the child. This starts at home. The foundation of any behavior is rooted in the home.

Here is an example;
Lets say that shortly before "Jane" was born you baby proofed the house. Not just for safety, but to preserve grand mama's heirlooms, things that have survived 3 generations of children NOT being allowed to touch them.
Let me ask you, when you were a child, did grand mama keep those things out of your reach? OR were you expected NOT to touch them, regardless of where they were? A lot of parents these days do not teach their children that there are pretty things in the world that we should not touch, even if we CAN. Now, I am not saying you put your heirlooms in front of a wobbly toddler! I am saying that it is perfectly ok, when the level of reasoning is beyond the intellectual grasp of the child, to say no, because you said so.
No guilt required.
After all, who wants to miss out on a friends' pot-luck, for fear that your friend's Hummel collection might not survive your child?

If you are a parent of more than one child, you know that individuality exists at the youngest ages, and siblings differ greatly from one another. I think the real wisdom of a parent is in knowing your child enough, to know what is effective for them. My children are vastly different from one another. However, limits of acceptable' apply to them both equally, but with consequences for disobedience tailored to the child. My five year old doesn't respond at all to screaming or spanking. He responds very well to doing "wall squats" and holding books on his head, in the corner. My three year old however is VERY much deterred from a behavior by a methodically calculated swat. (Especially when he is being "sneaky"... it doesn't even have to hurt. It is a shock to be caught red-handed when you don't hear it coming!)

Limits must be enforced, or you might as well not have them. You can undo a whole lot of positive by not being vigilant. The key to making any change is

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