by E. P. Ned Burke

Created on: April 30, 2008

"Searching For Eldorado" - Finding Winny A Date

Later that night I was three sheets to the wind on the floor in Boomer's basement. This time, in addition to Boomer, Winny and me, other preppies-namely Mooch, Froggy, and Ace-were also in attendance.

"Where did your parents go this time, Boomer?" Mooch asked.

"Some damn newspaper conference in Binghamton. They won't be back until late. So partake of the bubbly and the butts and enjoy, my friends." Boomer raised his chained church key to another Rolling Rock and tossed the top into a nearby trash can. He looked around, half blind from the thick smoke in the basement, and cursed, "Okay, who's the dickhead who stole my cigs?"

"Ace has them," I said.

"You got my Winstons?" he asked Ace.

"Friggin' A!"

Ace was big and strong like an oak tree, but not quite as articulate. If you asked him if he ever got laid, he'd say, "Friggin' A." If you asked him if he was a moron, he'd say without hesitation, "Friggin' A." And, even if you asked him if his name was really Alfonso Ashbrunner, he'd still say, "Friggin' A."

Froggy, on the other hand, had a vast array of words at his disposal. The problem was he said them so fast that at times they would pile up on one another.

"The smoke inhereiskillin'me, you guys."

He got his name because of his bulgy eyes and the thick glasses he wore. We didn't think he took it as an insult. He had mirrors in his home; so he must have known he looked like an amphibian. Besides, if he wanted, he could change his name back to Francis Malcolm Burkowski after high school. It was his choice. But we all felt he'd be smart to stick with Froggy.
Well, Boomer couldn't wait to tell the guys about Angela.

"Guess who Killjoy is taking to the prom?" He didn't wait for an answer. "None other than Angela Marino."

"You mean the big titty waitress at that pizza place?" Mooch asked.

"That's correct," I said.

"How about that?" Boomer sounded like a proud papa.

"Friggin' A." Ace was definitely impressed.

Mooch, always the derisive one, asked me, "Why on earth does she want to go with you?"
I rolled the bottle of beer between my hands waiting for the oohs to die down before unleashing my comebacker at him.

"Size, my friend. She obviously heard I was hung like Godzilla."

The laughter soon turned into a beer fizz fight as bottles were shaken and beer foam was sprayed all over me. Man! That was one glorious, one-upmanship moment, spoiled only by Winny's quiet demeanor. He was sitting in the corner sucking on his straw and looking glum. I

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