It seems everyone has a different opinion of cheating. "If I don't actually have sex with someone else I am not cheating!" or "If a man looks at other women than his wife, he is cheating!" What people need to do is use some common sense and think from both sides.
I am watching TV with my wife and a Victoria secret commercial comes on. Thin, beautiful woman in skimpy lingerie showing ample cleavage through a lace bra. I am a man, so of course I am going to look at it and enjoy every second I can. is that cheating? If my wife sees me drooling she might very well get ticked at me, so I try to glance away once or twice while swallowing as much saliva as I can get down while still filling my eyes as much as I can. But you know what? It is not cheating. I know for a fact that if we are watching a movie and it shows a good looking guys but, my wife will have no problem saying something crude then! Do I get upset? No, I know it is natural for people to look at beauty!
I am with a friend at the mall, and a girl walks by in what we refer to as "Liquid Jeans" for the way they form to the cheeks. Both of us will turn and watch he walk away and try as hard as we can to print the picture to our memory. Do I have any thoughts about actually doing anything sexual with that woman? No! In the very worst it will put me in the mood to beg my wife that night. If a woman is exceptionally beautiful, men will look. I also know for a fact that women will look at men very often as well. I do not think it is wrong to look. Now if I actually go even as far as thinking of "What" I would want to do to that particular woman then that is probably going to far.
Even the bible is similar to this when it talks about sin. For the most part, the bible says we are human and thoughts will pop into our heads. It is not a sin to have a thought. It is the action that is the sin. Yet it also says if we lust after a woman (who is not our wife) and we ENTERTAIN those thoughts then it is the same as if we are doing them. So again, we will see women and enjoy looking at them. That is not cheating. If we go so far as to think about what we would want to do with her? Then we cross the lines.
For the easily offend, please don't read further........
Many men like to look at porn. Whether it be a DVD, magazine, or on-line, a lot of men like it. Even a lot of married men. Is this cheating? Again I think it would come down to certain things. One is how your spouse would like it if they found out. IF they would be really ticked off then it is probably wrong to do it. Yet the fact is, woman do not need sex as often as men do. Too often women will turn their husbands down night after night then expect him to not do anything about it. This is ridiculous thinking! The normal case is that a man going a couple weeks without it is like a woman going five years without sex. The desire strain is about the same in this aspect. Women don't understand this because they would never be turned down by their husband for five years, or even a year. Okay even a month if he was determined! After a month he would still give in even if he didn't want to. So when women make their husband go weeks without it, what do they expect him to do? He is going to take things into his own hands! (No pun intended!) It is also scientific fact that men are visual creatures. A reason we prefer the lights on and so many woman prefer the lights off. So while taking matters into our own hands, we will also turn to visual effects. Ladies, the men are not desiring to be with the women in the pictures so much as they are just trying to get to take care of things! If they had the chance, for the most part, they would much rather be with their wives!
I am not saying it is morally okay with God to do this. I am just saying that I don't think it is cheating on the wife unless the man does it RATHER than be with his wife. A lot of women seem to forget that men are a different creature than they are. Our needs are different and in some cases they HAVE to be taken care of. It is not always choice. One might as well ask a crack addict to ignore the stash sitting in the dresser drawer and go through the withdrawals instead. It won't happen!