There are many topics which can be very difficult for parents to discuss with children, and talking to children about a serious illness, such as cancer, can be particularly hard. Cancer is even difficult for many adults to talk about, so it is natural to feel unsure of what to say to your child when it is time to discuss the illness. The guidelines below should help you form a discussion about cancer between you and your children.

Be Honest and Straightforward

Cancer is a very abstract concept for young children, and older children have assumptions and ideas about cancer from television, books, and their friends' experiences.

When telling children that an important person in their lives has cancer, it is best to tell them directly and explain a little bit about the cancer at an age appropriate level.

The word "cancer" should be used openly in your conversations; by avoiding the word, or using slang like, "the big C," children can get the impression that cancer is a taboo topic. Explain the disease in terms that are concrete as possible. For example, explaining that there is lump inside Dad's belly, and it is growing and making him sick is easier for a child to understand then personifying the cancer and explaining it as a little gremlin hurting Daddy's stomach. You do not want to give your child the wrong impression about what the disease truly is.

Assure Children that They Are Safe

Children typically are first concerned with how the news about someone's cancer is going to effect them. Make sure they know that they are safe, cared for, and loved - no matter what happens.

It's natural for children to first be concerned about the impact of cancer on themselves, and then be concerned for the patient. They want to know how the disease is going to effect them. Reassure children that they will be able to continue their activities and lives, and if there are going to be major disturbances, you can explain those changes and how your children's perceived needs will be met.

Tailor the Information to their Ages

While it's important for all children to understand what to expect in the near future and the treatment side effects they might witness, the level of detail is different by age groups.

Children younger than six need to know that the person with cancer will be going to the doctor, and the children should know that the medicine can make people cranky, tired, and can make them look different, and lose their hair.

Children in

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