by Sondra Deuber

Created on: April 26, 2008

My personal website e-mail account is an ongoing source of entertainment, always stuffed with an amazing collection of unsolicited e-mail. It has a spam filter which only works if I put in keywords or phrases to identify which messages to mark as spam. Once that's done, it filters out hundreds of really bizarre messages.

But the folks who send this junk is what really fascinates me. I get some pretty weird ideas from the e-mail I get. For example, for a while I got dozens of messages that invited me to see photos of my neighbor naked. I only have 2 neighbors close enough that I'd recognize them. The other one, I'm told, is very shy. You could show me a picture of almost anybody on the planet and tell me it was him/her and I wouldn't have any reason to argue with you.

Then it wasn't my neighbor I'd get to see naked. It was my high school teacher. Well, I started thinking about that and decided that, of all the teachers I had in high school, there wasn't one of them I can remember wanting to see naked. Didn't want to then and certainly wouldn't want to now. I graduated from high school in 1959 and don't imagine any of them look too good now.

Next I got dozens of definitely unsolicited e-mails inviting me to view photos and videos of myself naked! All of them were from different people. I spent a while trying to visualize the view from the road if passersby happened to see all of these folks outside trying to take pictures through my closed mini-blinds and curtains. It would be quite a sight. First, they would have had to actually find the house or, I should say, trailer out in the most rural kind of environment, literally out in the middle of nowhere. Then to fit that many photographers around a relatively few windows, nobody could have gotten a clear shot. If they were trying to shoot from the front of the house, they would have needed small ladders. That would have been pretty conspicuous, even at night.

The windows at the back of the house are on the upslope side of the hill and are much more accessible. But there are only 3 windows on that side, and there is a big, bright security light. I spent a little time trying to visualize what they had to go through to get pictures of me out here and how much fun it would've been to see how long it took one of the friendlier people in what can be laughingly call the neighborhood to stop and see what everybody was taking pictures of! I'm assuming that they all showed up at the same time, since the messages all arrived within

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