by Roberta Velyn

Created on: April 26, 2008   Last Updated: June 03, 2008

A divorce can be terrifying for children, or it can be the beginning of an era of peace in a home where everyone has been feeling besieged. Your children may be sad or they may act out in anger. Here are some tips for helping children deal with divorce:

1) Make sure the children have the opportunity for regular, frequent contact with the non-custodial parent and both sets of relatives.

2) Be honest with your children. There's enough uncertainty in their lives right now - don't leave them guessing about the things you say or do.

3) If you can't say something good, don't say anything at all - about your child's other parent.

4) Keep things as normal as possible. Some disruption is inevitable, but avoid unnecessary complications.

5) Do everything you can to help your kids (and yourself) remember the good times you've had as a family, but don't encourage false hope for reconciliation. Make plans for new celebrations and holidays.

6) Comfort and support your children when they display emotion. A child who weeps for her recently-deceased Grandfather may also be mourning the loss of her family unit, but she's giving you an explanation that she can accept. You have to accept it too.

During separation, throughout the divorce process and once you're single again, consider your children's best interests in all that you do. You're dividing up the property and the pensions, so your net worth is diminished by half. Invest heavily in your most promising assets - your children.

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