Those of us who love "Family Guy" have just one problem: There aren't enough new episodes! Now I know the drill....every show has to be replayed while the new ones are being put together, but I get so many stupid-style guffaws out of this show....I think I could really use more of it in my life.
Who can forget, for example, when Peter, the main character, knocks out the pregnant woman? Relax, ladies. This woman really looks like a man, and that's the great part. She even talks like a man. At one point in the episode, Peter runs into her again and she has her baby with her. It looks like she's going to whip stuff out and start breast-feeding when Peter says "Aw, geez fellah, can't you take that outside?"
The funniest part about the whole series is how incurably stupid Peter is. At one point he visits the doctor who tells him, for the first time in his life, that he is actually, legitimately retarded. He has to go home and tell his family....who, of course, already knows.
Another ridiculous adventure takes place when Chris starts "talking street". Peter splashes him with his drink and yells "He's speaking in tongues! The power of Christ compels you..!" Cleveland, Peter's black friend, tells Peter that he should teach Chris about his Irish heritage. But while they're investigating, Peter finds out his great-great grandfather was a slave. Hilarity ensues as Peter joins a large group of black people who are trying to get reparations, and he starts dressing like a Nigerian and changes his name to Keechwa. Finding out his snobby father-in-law, who hangs out with Ted Turner and Bills Gates, is a descendant of the family that enslaved his ancestor, Peter throws a fit. His father-in-law goes to write him a check for 10,000 dollars just to shut him up and asks "How do you spell Keechwa?" To which Peter replies, "You know what, screw the Keechwa, make it out to Peter Griffin....P-e-t-e-r....".
Brian, the family dog (who has the same problems as people and dances and sings better than most) is quite the intellectual, and counters alot of what Peter says by shooting back witty comments, which of course go completely over Peter's head. He attends therapy sessions and smokes cigarettes, watches t.v. with a martini and says things like "Me? Go to New York City? I've been there....it's like Prague sans the whimsy." A dog who uses French terms to pepper his conversation. And yet sounds like a totally normal guy. If you blindfolded yourself, Brian would probably seem like a pretty good catch.
On to Stewie, who I think has alot to do with the popularity of the show. Personally, I think he is an essential character, certainly, but without the other personalities to balance out his, he'd probably just get annoying. His has one of those wierd American-turned-English-to-be-cool accents like Madonna suddenly developed about 10 years ago. You know, because no one can resist an English accent...but she couldn't pull it off. Well, Stewie sounds like he's doing the same thing, to sound a bit more sophisticated than his family. But he is often the smartest of the bunch, except of course for his mother Lois, who he is always plotting to kill. Stewie's sexual orientation is called into question repeatedly throughout the show, even though he's only about a year old and has had a serious relationship during which his loving girlfriend turned out to be after his cookie and nothing more.
A classic episode involving Stewie and Brian involves Brian having to work for Stewie because he can't pay back some money he owes him (no one would even dream of asking how a one-year-old came into money, or what a dog would need it for). Nevertheless, Brian dresses up and comes to a certain room in the house Stewie has made look like an office, complete with a desk, computer and phone. Stewie walks around trying to act like a boss, and Brian is left rolling his eyes and forcibly pretends to be working, just to play along. Stewie decides to practice his management skills, so he comes over to Brian's desk and says:
Stewie: Now, I'm going to do something I like to call the 'Compliment Sandwich" Where I say something good, talk about where you need improvement, and then end with something good.
Brian: Whatever you gotta do...
Stewie (flips notepad): Something good... something good... You look like SNOOPY and it makes me smile... but you have smelly dog farts.
The two kids in the family, Meg and Chris, are hopeless losers, but they do add some spice to the show. Meg, however, is really boring, never has anything interesting to do or say, and her main role in the show is to be there for Peter, Stewie and Chris to make fun of. In fact, Peter often forgets her name....he knows he has three kids, but when he tries to visualize the third one in his mind, he can only picture one of those robots from Star Wars.
Characters outside the immediate family are great too. The newscasters can be a scream. They make horrifically inappropriate comments at eachother when they think the camera is turned off, and when they know it's turned on, the insults don't get much better. A great moment involving these two knuckleheads (Tom Tucker and Diane Simmons) is when Diane starts her news broadcast, in a very professional, polished tone, by saying:
Diane Simmons: Tom, I'm getting late word that you're a petty, jealous closet-case.
Tom Tucker: Bit of breaking news, we now go live to Diane being a bitch. Diane.
But the most awkward, horrifying and utterly hilarious scenes featuring Tom and Diane happens when there is a problem at the cable company of some kind, and the two decide to cut loose and say whatever they want since no one can hear them.....or so they think.
Tom Tucker: Because of an accident today at the Quahog cable company, all television transmission will be out for an undetermined amount of time. Of course, no one can see this news program, so it doesn't really matter what we say. I'm the Lord Jesus Christ. I think I'll go get drunk and beat up some midgets, how about you, Diane?
Diane Simmons: Well, Tom, I just plain don't like black people.
Camera man: Hey guys, we're still on in Boston.
And one more for the road:
Tom Tucker: Well Diane, that last report was so good I think you deserve a spanking.
Diane: Oh Tom, I don't think your wife would appreciate that.
Tom: Haha, that frigid old cow lives in Quahog she can't hear a word I'm saying.
Camera Guy: Actually, we're back on the air in Quahog.
Anyway, as the theme song says, rather too extravagantly for the year 2008 (the creator seems to be a guy who is very well-versed in musicals...), we're "lucky there's a family guy!" Well, that was a bit much on my part too. I haven't done the show justice. An article with every great moment would take forever to write. They pack tons of fun into every episode. Watch it, if you haven't, you probably haven't laughed in a while.