After picking my fiance up from County Jail for the second time three years ago, it hit me; I had probably chosen the wrong guy to shack up with. I chewed the bite of reality over and over in my mind, and came to the conclusion to finally let the relationship go. As hard as it was for me to do, it was also the best decision I could have made; and I've been a card-carrying "geek lover" ever since. Thats right, I'd choose a nerdy guy in an argyle sweater vest any day. My transition from bad boys to mama's boys is exactly why I feel I've unlocked the truth about why women constantly and happily fall for the wrong guys, then search their brains wondering how the spell was cast over them so easily.

A bad boy doesn't have to be a James Dean, leather wearing, motorcycle rider. It's not required that he be a thuggish rough neck with a criminal record and baggy pants. All that's required is the scent of a quality that most women can't seem to resist; the need of a woman's touch. Unkempt, un-hemmed, something about him that suggests he's had it rough. Women appeal to the needs of others, it's in our nature. Give us a fixer upper any day, and we'll find a way to make magic from a mess. The bad boy is simply the perfect mess for us to try to fix. It's not the same, the metro-sexual clean cut male. He's already been fixed, if he even needed fixing at all. He has no desperation, no sadness behind his eyes, no firmly erected walls that we must break down to get to his chewy center. He's out there in plain sight, without challenge or obstacle. And as practical and mother-friendly as he might be, he just doesn't offer the same thrill. Women like to feel needed, and knowing that you are the proverbial rose in the seam a man's tattered sidewalk excels your femininity to a level that is beyond anything you can imagine. It's practically erotic.

I say, go ahead. Indulge yourself in the pleasures of a rough-handed bad boy. Someone you know is on the verge of smashing your heart to pieces, if thats your thing. Argue with him passionately about why you don't trust him and then secretly take pleasure in his strong silent way of shutting you up. Take it all in and really let it wash over you. Because when it all comes down to it, as fun as it feels to tame the wild beast, a bad boy can never truly be good. The only one to change will be yourself. And if your smart, you'll realize that love, if it is to ever go anywhere real, is best when served by a kind and simple systems analyst who likes to bring home flowers and watch you smile.

Learn more about this author, Ashley Bolden.
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