by Jade Green

Created on: April 22, 2008   Last Updated: May 05, 2008

When my husband and I first talked about having children, we talked about religion, and how it would come into play in our children's lives. I was raised Baptist, with very strict conditions that became like a compulsive disorder in my adult life. My husband, now agnostic, was given the typical "default" Christian upbringing; church on occasion with an otherwise un-religious childhood. Because of my "recovering baptist" status, I automatically vowed to expose the children to Christianity then had to agree with my husband's view that it would be wrong to do so. And what spiritual fate does that hold for our kids? Well, that

depends on how you look at it.

The Baptist brood I grew up with would be horrified by my children's religious indifference, such as my younger daughter's "What's a church?" to my oldest daughter taking God's name in vain when exasperated. From the beginning we have rejected every bit of religious paraphernalia that's tried to sneak its way into our house, from nativity ornaments to coloring books, reassuring ourselves that when the time was right, because of our vigilance, our children would have the mental tools to choose their beliefs for themselves. Well meaning family members from both sides, even those that aren't particularly devout, have found our logic suspect and were compelled to send Veggie Tales tapes or Gospel CD's to the kids, as if we're a religious charity case. But our plan is to introduce religion as a story (God forbid), not a fact. And not just one story. Every religion is different, and those differences should be respected and weighed for what each child feels is right for them. Not teaching them until they are old enough to be objective will hopefully grant them the freedom that I as a child never felt - the freedom to question what they think is wrong.

Our elementary school teachers, counselors, and the like agree we are doing the right thing. (Of course they would, those evildoers.) Although we live in Kansas, where a law was passed recently that requires Intelligent Design (which is similar to the Creation Theory) to be taught in Science, most of our local educators assure us that simply making our children feel their choices will be supported by us will by far become their most sacred belief. And that's exactly what we're shooting for.

Even with all our efforts, some things never change. Case in point: My oldest daughter, on the ride home from school, talking about how she believes God made the clouds: "But he doesn't make everything," she explains. "He doesn't?" I ask her curiously. "No," she says. "He doesn't make toys. Santa Claus does that."

Learn more about this author, Jade Green.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.