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As a mother, and former preschool teacher, I have been on both ends of the stick. Some children are more prone to separation anxiety than others. It is part of normal development, so it's important for you as the parent to know that you aren't doing something "wrong" if your toddler or preschooler experiences separation anxiety. You aren't a bad parent for having to go to work.

If you are new to the daycare scene, try setting up some extra time before you "officially" start the program. Go in with your child for an hour or two a couple days out of the week. Let them explore the environment with you there, trying to allow them the freedom to move around without needing to hold your hand. Play with them, read to them, get them used to the routine and environment while still having the security of having you there.

When it is time for you to go, I have found that it's actually harder on the child if you linger due to their anxiety. If they fuss or cry when you leave, then you stop to hug them ten or twenty times, giving them the reassuring talk of "I'll be back soon". What you are actually doing is feeding into their negative behavior. They see that if they fuss and make a scene, you will stay longer. They begin to use this against you, prolonging the length of anxiety. Hug them, kiss them, then walk away.
Some preschool centers have monitors in the office of each room. You could watch your child from there to see that it only takes a short while for them to recover from crying before joining their friends and having fun.

For those who truly do have a difficult time being away from their parents, there are a few things that will help your child throughout the day:
- allowing them to bring their favorite blanket, pillow, or stuffed animal for nap-time
- bringing pictures of you and your family for them to look at
- if you are dropping your child off in the morning at or before breakfast, pack them a special snack that you can get them started on before you have to go: a muffin, cereal bar, or other healthy food choice that they enjoy.
- perhaps you have a watch or pair of sunglasses that you don't really need. Let your child "hold it" for you while you're away. Giving them something tangible to hang onto.

I have encountered a few parents who will stay and linger until their child cries for them. They seem to need the reassurance themselves that their child will miss them while they are gone, or that they are needed. This does more damage to the child than good. Please don't

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