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If you're really into the self help books, and a do-it-yourself person, then I highly recommend "The 5 Love Languages" by Garry Chapman.
My pre-marital councilor/officiant/best friends grandfather gave this book to me and my husband as a wedding gift. The book is about 5 major love languages, a love language being the way in which you or your spouse interpret love. Some examples are: Acts of service, Verbal Affirmation and Gift Giving. Every person perceives love differently and this book helps you to understand your own as well as your spouses love language to prevent either one of you from feeling unloved.

The book also talks about how your parents and life growing up affects your love language. If your parents were touchy feely all the time, then you may perceive love stronger through physical contact that a simple uttering of positive words. Dr. Chapman takes this to another level when he talks about people having secondary love languages.

Without that special feeling, people tend to get depressed or irritated. This book helped me and my husband define how best to love one another to our fullest potential. Sure some of the little exercises are hokey, and at first we were just joking around, but then we became more comfortable with them. This book made it easier to go to my husband and say "I know you love me, but I'm just not feeling that love lately and I could really use it right about now." Dr. Gary Chapman also does seminars and often refers to them in the book. His book had made my first year of marriage much easier by my perspective than most newly wed couples.

This is a fairly short book, and does it's job best if you read it together. My husband and I took turns reading to one another and discussing the book. Yes it was weird at first, but once we began to see the truth in what Dr. Chapman had to say, we began to take it more seriously. We reached a point where we hadn't even been married a whole year and were already considering divorce. We thought it was all a mistake and we just rushed everything and now it was all ruined. Then one day I saw the book, and I said to my husband, "You know we never finished that book. Maybe before we call it quits, we should give this love language thing a try?" That was the best thing we ever did. You see, it wasn't that we didn't love one another, we just didn't know how to speak each others love language. And now that we have mastered that, I feel like we are ready to move on and become more than just best friends in love. We are finally ready to master the art of life partnership!

I hope you go out and purchase this book, if for no other reason than curiosity. So many good thing have come from it for me and my husband.

Learn more about this author, Amelia Borden.
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