by Sammy Jobson

Created on: April 17, 2008

Make sleep your best friend. Get to know it well, and learn to enjoy its company. Don't feel guilty about getting reacquainted with this old buddy. Without enough quality sleep you eventually turn into a quivering blob of tears and frustration; with enough quality sleep you feel you can run a marathon with a smile on your face. You get to choose.

For years I was a chronic insomniac. I know my living room couch like the back of my hand. I've read a lot of books between the hours of 3:00 and 6:00 am. I know more than I want to about the nocturnal guy who lives across the road (why would anyone keep that much string in their garage? Who invites someone to take pictures of their house at 2:00 in the morning? Why doesn't he throw anything away?). I can pour myself a bowl of cereal without turning on the kitchen lights or making any noise.

But those days are over. I have learned to embrace my inner sleeper. Every night before going to bed I sigh, "Aaaahhhh, I love going to bed." It drives my husband crazy.

How did I do it, you ask? The same way you get to Carnegie Hall: practice, practice, practice. And by that I don't mean practice lying in your bed for 8 hours a night not sleeping. I mean take some time during the day to learn how to let go, physically and mentally. Before, when I was an insomniac, I had no idea how to reach a state of complete and utter relaxation, which I think is key for achieving a good night's sleep, especially if you're a chronic insomniac. I used to wake up in the morning (if I hadn't already been awake all night) clenching all my arm muscles. The second I awoke I was tense. I had no idea why, and no-one even understood my complaint (one physiotherapist recommended sleeping with more pillows). Only now do I realize that I constantly maintained a state of heightened vigilance and alertness, even when I was sleeping. I probably rarely entered deep, stage four sleep, which is absolutely mandatory for a wide range of bodily and mental functions, including muscle repair.

When I had young children it was even worse. Mothers seem to have a sixth sense-they often wake up in the night even before their child starts crying. For me this reflex never shut down. Even now I usually wake immediately when a child enters my room. But I used to be on my feet at the first peep, worrying. Now I can reassure myself that if they really need me, they'll come get me, and even if I'm in a really deep sleep they can shake me awake.

I achieved sleep nirvana by practicing

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