by Ted Ibarra

Created on: December 09, 2006   Last Updated: April 23, 2007

Dating isn't like riding a bike guys. Do you remember what it was like when you first took off on your bike only to find yourself a bit too over confident and then you crashed and burned. Well, if you're not careful, you'll do the same thing when approaching or dating a woman for the first time. Of course you were hanging on tight to the handle bars but you'll need to hang on tighter to your eyes and words when making that first impression. "Pause", pause and pause again. It's like crossing an intersection that has no stop signs and traffic signals. Proceed with caution! Here's how you want to make that first impression a good one. First, you want to look your best. From head to toe. Looking good on the outside gives you the confidence to feel good on the inside. And, as we all know as men, we need lots and lots of confidence. We lack it from day one! Plus, you don't wash your car on the outside without the inside being clean too. Alright, now that we got that taken care of, arrive to pick her up about five minutes late. You've got to make her feel like you're not over anxious. And, when you make her think that you're not trying to "over impress" her on the first date, you can fall back on that key ingredient I mentioned before....."pause". That being you made her have to "pause" to look at the time and to recognize you weren't being over anxious and arriving right on time. It's that point I've been trying to make about you holding on to the handle bars and keeping control of the situation and the overall direction of which you're both going. Okay, now you're on your way to dinner and what do you say? Talk about the weather, talk about her place, talk about her outfit? Of course, talk about it all but "pause" in between each conversation so the transition is "smooth" and you've got control. When a woman recognizes insecurity and doubt, then she just took the handle bars away from you and now you're fighting to get them back. Not bullying you, but looking to test you, challenge you and even demoralize you in those "girlish" kind of ways that never quite leave a woman's feeling of putting us men in our place. Yes, our place! Wrapped around a finger or standing one step behind her is where we need not go. Accomplish this early in the evening and the rest of the night is yours. The conversations that are simplified through the evening are the ones that don't require a Q & A but rather a "hand off" of the rutter that has to go back and forth between the two of you. Let her guide and when you've made the eye contact that holds her attention you can then take back the rutter for smooth sailing all night long. Can't quite tell what else to say because if I did then you would be picking yourself up cause you just let go of the handle bars. Just remember pal, "pause", "pause" and "pause" again. When you master that, then you're riding far back on that bike seat and ready to let go of the handle bars when you want to knowing that you can grab them back anytime and anywhere. Best of luck!

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