Is it better for schools to be rigorous or nurturing?

Nurturing

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by Elaine Grant

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School can be a frightening, insecure place for many children even those who are average or above average. A child with excellent verbal skills, may be struggling with math. Some students may be creative, writing beautiful stories while others may be excellent artists. There are those students who are close minded and others who are open ready to learn. Children are not little paper dolls cut from a universal pattern. Each child is a unique design. I taught elementary school for more than twenty years and I encountered more differences than similarities among my students. Consequently, it is necessary for teachers to be flexible, adaptable, nurturing, and most of all patient.

Teaching is a challenging creative career which requires a gentle understanding touch when shaping the young growing mind. The goal for a teacher is to teach and create children who are good learners. This is a difficult task and requires infinite skills. Part of these skill involve being a counsellor and psychologist with an understanding of children's psyche. Children do not learn well when they feel intimidated, and especially when they suffer from a poor self image. A nurturing teacher tries to make their students feel good about themselves and their abilities.

In a structured school system where everyone is expected to achieve at a high level on standardized tests,those students whose abilities are below average often become discouraged,give up, and sometimes act out. It is my contention, that many of these children will eventually succeed, but it may take them a longer time. Words of encouragement, help from concerned teachers and parents, and praise for other things they do well, will go a long way to help them continue toward success.

Every child has value and they should be nurtured. I can remember one incident in my career that showed this. Each child had a personal diary in which they were to write a story about a meaningful experience. I set aside part of each day for them to share one of these stories with the rest of the class. This part was purely voluntary. One day a little girl who was achieving at a low level, but was the most enthusiastic about writing stories and sharing them with other students raised her hand to read her entry aloud. She held her diary close to her face to read what she had written which went something like, "My Day at the Park with my Daddy." "Yesterday my Daddy took me to the park. He had two sandwiches for us to eat and two boxes of juice. We sat under a tree and ate together. Daddy makes good sandwiches. After we ate and drank our juice, I asked daddy if he would push me on the swing. He said he would. He pushed me for a long time. We had a good time together." After she read the story a little boy called out, "She didn't write anything on the page." I said to her, "That's a wonderful story. I loved it. Maybe the next time you can write it down so you won't forget it. I will help you." And to the little boy I said, "Some stories are written on paper but others are told like this one, but they are both good stories." I don't remember whether or not he ever wrote a story to share with the other students. But the little girl continued to share stories with the class.

The next year she had a seizure in her new class. She never had such an incident in my class. The other teacher was far stricter and expected her to achieve at the same level as the other students. Consequently, the little girl became stubborn, nervous, and her achievement slowed. When they called the paramedics and her parents, the parents asked that their child be brought to my room to rest while the emergency workers examined her. Her parents wanted her in a place where she was happy before they took her home. The other teacher was competent but with a different style, more structured, less accepting of differences. The parents removed their child from the school.

Another incident which illustrated differences, concerns a young boy who was an extremely creative artist and also an able student. When he finished his assignments he would draw and create beautiful paper sculptures. One day his mother came to our room and found him in the process of drawing instead of studying from one his books. Mother looked at his finished work, proceeded to criticize it, and reprimand him in front of the other students. It was my policy to allow children to do things that interested them at their desk so long as their work was finished. This parent considered art a wasteful, useless pursuit. She wanted him be become a doctor not a starving artist. Let's consider the artists at Disney, those who create video games, and designers. This parent wanted her son with a teacher who was more structured so she had him removed from my room.

Yes, it is easy to see I am into nurturing more than being rigorous in my approach to education. However, just as there are children with different talents and abilities; there are also teachers with different styles of teaching. So it is inevitable that during a student's career in school they will be subject to a large variety of teaching methods, and they too must be able to adjust to these changes to grow intellectually.

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