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| At home | 53% | 623 votes | Total: 1172 votes | |
| No-use | 47% | 549 votes |
At home
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Add to FavoritesChildren learn all the reasons not to drink in school. They learn all the dangers of drinking and driving and the health risks of alcohol and drugs. Possibly the fact that they hear this from their teachers may be one of the reasons they feel the need to at least try the stuff. Doing exactly what you're told not to do is something we've all been doing since we first learned the word "no". I use a different approach. I treat my children like people with opinions and minds of their own. They may not always agree with me but I respect and encourage that. I not only tell my children what they should and shouldn't do but also why. Not just because I said so.
Teaching your children to drink responsibly doesn't have to mean sharing a drink with them over dinner. It doesn't have to mean ever buying a drink for them at all. It doesn't mean encouraging or condoning teen drinking. It means first setting a good example yourself. I myself rarely drink and when I do I don't get drunk and I never drive. I do, however, share stories from my teen years and all the mistakes I made. It means saying "I know you'll probably want to try drinking yourself someday so here are some things you should never do. Don't ever drink and drive. Don't ever get in a car with someone who's been drinking, including friends' parents who say their fine. If you do decide to drink while at a party don't get drunk. Just have one or two drinks and don't drink too fast. If you do decide to drink know that you'll probably do something stupid or something you wouldn't normally do when you're sober."
My children also know that if they are ever in a situation where they can't drive or their friends can't drive that they are to call me for a ride home, no matter what time it is. I can't promise not to have an opinion about it but I have promised they won't be in any trouble for it. I've told their friends the same thing and made sure they have my phone number. They know I don't want them to drink but if they do I at least want them to be safe.
In today's society of peer pressure and drinking games that even your young teen knows about, simply telling your child not to drink is irresponsible and a bit naive. Parenting means not only teaching right and wrong but also preparing your child to live in this world without you. Don't get me wrong, I don't want my teens to drink and I share that attitude with them often. But I am also not naive enough to think they will never try it. My ninth grader gets invited to parties all the time and has since she was in seventh grade. Teen drinking exists and your children are exposed to it constantly, in real life and in movies and television. The teen years are when they practice being adults. They may not be ready to make adult decisions but they certainly think they are. So this is when you help them with these decisions by giving them all the facts and a few tips and tricks here and there.
Learn more about this author, Heather Rascon.
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No-use
Should parents teach children how to drink responsibly or maintain a no use policy at home?
Maintaining a no use policy at home is a great way of teaching children how to use alcohol responsibly. Children invariably learn from example and they can learn alcohol abuse from their parents. Children watch what parents do and learn from the examples they set.
Most adults who abuse alcohol started at a very young age and because their parents either drank at home or allowed them to try an alcoholic beverage. Examples set in the home almost always continue on into adulthood. This is particularly true of children who witness their parents drinking,coming home drunk or being invited by a family member to try a little nip of an alcoholic beverage.
Parents who use alcohol are more likely than those who don't to raise children who have substance abuse problems as adults. There is a direct relationship between parents who abuse alcohol or drugs at home and their children's own substance abuse problems.
A no use policy is the best policy for preventing irresponsible use of alcohol by children. Parents complain that their children do not listen to what they say. This is true children begin to listen to their peers more at about age twelve rather than their parents. Children do pay close attention to what their parents do. Children are always looking for social approval from family members. Children look for and nearly always find inconsistencies between what their parents say and what they actually do.
It is illegal in many states to allow children under the age of eighteen or twenty-one in some states, to use or purchase alcohol. This is whether or not the alcohol is consumed in the parents home and with or without parental supervision. It is also illegal in many states to purchase alcohol for a minor. Parents could end up being incarcerated for purchasing alcohol for their children or allowing their children or friends of their to consume alcohol in their homes.
A no use policy would let your children see that you use alcohol responsibly and the best teachers are those who do not abuse alcohol themselves. Take the time to explain your feeling about alcohol use and most importantly set the example.
Learn more about this author, Danette M. Scott.
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