Results so far:
| No | 69% | 779 votes | Total: 1125 votes | |
| Yes | 31% | 346 votes |
I have been accused of being blunt to the point of bringing people far, far down from their originally happy state. I think one of the big problems of society is that people don't speak for themselves, they speak for either their view of right and wrong, or they speak relating to what someone of a higher authority has told them to say in a certain situation. It seems as though people have a block against telling the truth. A simple question of "Do I look fat in this?" has turned into this whole big "no no." If someone looks fat in a certain piece of clothing, I'm going to tell them to take it off and try something else. It's not that I'm saying they're fat, I'm saying that the clothes made them look fat; and that's where I think the difference between right and wrong has gone out the window.
When people are asked that question, they don't know what to say. They question themselves before answering: "Do I say they do and feel bad, or do I say they look fine and feel guilty for letting them out of the house that way?" If I ask someone a question of that nature, not necessarily, "Do I look fat?" I expect an honest answer. Being that I'm in high school, I always second guess my peers' evaluation of my question. I'll ask, "Are you sure? Do you really think so?" just to make sure. I can't hold it against them for wanting to give me a better self image-as if I need a better one, not to be vain-but I still want a truism. This leads me to another point: Teenage girls have bad self images and little or no respect for themselves. I hate that. If anyone wants to know what really gets on my nerves, it's being asked by a pencil if they're fat-not if they LOOK fat, but if they actually ARE fat. I'm not fat, so why would I ask anyone that question? I may, once a month, ask if I look bloated, but that's certainly not the same thing. The self image thing isn't even my real problem-well, I could say it is because of what I'm going to say next. I'm entering my fourth and final year in high school and I've seen before my own eyes the level of promiscuity growing higher and higher. Shirts are cut down to the wire of the bra (This is good for evening wear, but not school), shorts and skirts are up to "there," and what really gets me is that little thirteen year old girls and boys have done more drugs, attended more court hearings, and contracted more diseases than I will ever in my entire life! When I was thirteen, I didn't even know what a drug test consisted of. Now, all they're doing in their art classes is talking about how to avoid being tested. I'm sorry, but I'm just appalled at everything that's going on in the world.
That's a good question to ask here: Are you appalled by what's going on in the world? In that case I would say yes, but the answer to the original question posed is no, I always say no when I want to.
Learn more about this author, Ali Coyne.
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In my life I am extremely opinionated. There was once a time when I would debate and argue a subject to death if I felt that I was right. Heck, sometimes just for the thrill of the argument. I had a great mind and I loved exercising it. But I have learned as I grew older that those aspects of a persons personality are often detrimental when it comes to a relationship. We cannot all remain opinionated teens for the rest of our lives. At some point we have to grow up and say 'yes' sometimes. In the past I picked men how liked to debate a subject with me. They appreciated me having a difference of opinion. I was able to say no or yes as I saw fit. But then I met my husband and he is a different species of man. In the beginning years of our relationship I was myself. I would argue my point with him and I would stand up for my
'no' opinions or my 'yes' opinions. But then I would like to think that I grew up. I realized that he hated that aspect of my personality. He wants to wear the pants in the family and he wants me to agree with his viewpoints and support them. This went against everything that I was. I used to be a bit feisty and very very opinionated. But I would like to think that our marriage has evolved.
The secret to our marriage being so successful is that I honor his judgment and opinion. I go ahead and agree even when I sometimes have a differing point of view. But I've discovered that I'm not always right in this world and sometimes its better to listen to someone else. So I have become one of those wives that flat out says 'yes' instead of 'no'. I agree with my husband. I think its made our marriage stronger. I think that maybe its better to not debate every issue constantly. I think that when you want your relationship to run smoothly and flow that you need to let one person lead and you need to learn to follow in some ways.
There can not be two alpha dogs in a relationship.
It actually feels good to not argue about things anymore. It feels good to not have to debate this or that. But every now and then I find myself still wanting to debate a subject or say something different. Its just in my nature to be contrary, I guess. But I'm mellowing with age and learning to just be more laid back and less argumentative. Sometimes its better to agree then disagree. Especially in a marriage.
Learn more about this author, Kim Sharpe.
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