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Should parents use corporal punishment to discipline children?
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| Yes | 42% | 1508 votes | Total: 3606 votes | |
| No | 58% | 2098 votes |
Yes
by Leeanna Haugen
Created on: September 16, 2009
Our society is progressively reducing the standards of behavior that are in place. We live in a world filled with people and books telling parents how to discipline their children. It is so bad that some parents are afraid to discipline their children. The result of this is evident in schools and playgrounds across the world. In fact, my daughter's teacher handed out copies of ways to teach your child good manners. It stressed how disrespectful children are to teachers and other students. It was a call for action.
Everyone will agree that children these days are, as a whole, very aggressive and disrespectful. Isn't it odd that this phenomenon coincides with the hype about spankings being child abuse? There is a great difference in me spanking my child to punish for very wrong behavior and me spanking my child because I get a thrill out of it. The difference is the intent and the motive. So, people are willing to nod their head and agree about the problem, but no one wants to actually get their hands dirty and do what needs to be done.
People will argue that children are traumatized by spankings. Well, this may or may not be true. However, if given the choice, would you rather your child be psychologically traumatized by a harsh spanking or dead because the time-out wasn't a sufficient enough deterrent to keep them out of the road? This is not a world where everything is black and white. There is NO one answer. Parents around the world need to consider all options when deciding the best form of discipline for each individual instance.
There are times when parents need to take swift action that will impact a child. There are times when parents cannot afford to have a repeat of the situation. Sure, time-outs are great for name-calling or making a mess. However, in the instance mentioned above about the child in the road, the parent needs to take an action that will effectively deter the child immediately. Spanking is a very resourceful tool. It is bold, can be done swiftly, and will make the impact that is absolutely needed in an instance such as this.
I am not saying it should be a parent's only means of discipline. However, spanking should not be taken out of the possibilities. Children are not going to hate the parents for trying to keep them safe. People who believe that spanking encourages violent behavior from children are not looking closely at the situation. There is more responsibility on the parent than just disciplining. You don't just spank your child and walk away. You have to talk to your child. You have to teach your child.
I don't know who can look at the society we are living in today and not see how children behave. There is no discipline anymore. Then, when there are actually parents who are willing to spank their child regardless of society's distorted views, they are ridiculed. Well, you need only to look at my children and see how they behave. I am very proud of the job I am doing. I have worked very hard to ensure my children have manners and respect. They know I will not rule out any means of discipline. I make my punishments fit the crime. Now, I rarely have to spank my child. The knowledge that I will do what I have to keeps them in line. As their mother, I have the responsibility to teach them how to be responsible adults. My role does not end with kissing their booboos and reading to them at night.
Learn more about this author, Leeanna Haugen.
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No
by Mia Watson
Created on: October 15, 2009 Last Updated: October 17, 2009
Think about the frustrations, mistakes, and often innocent blunders that happen to us all on a daily basis. Perhaps last week you spilled coffee on your shirt after not taking care to seal the take-out lid carefully; you snapped at your husband or wife simply because you were in a bad mood; you screwed up at work by forgetting to get the presentation ready on time. Now, imagine being hit for every one of these slip ups, in the name of discipline. Imagine having your boss slap you for mistakes you made at work, or having your wife smack you for forgetting to take out the garbage. Imagine them telling you that it's for your own good; the pain is all part of the correction that you so dearly need.
Would receiving physical pain and humiliation really generate any personal improvement? Could you stop making mistakes if you received enough of it?
Adults from all walks of life and circumstances make mistakes every day. It's all part of being human, and therefore, imperfect. We do the best that we can and hopefully try to learn from our mistakes.
It is unfair to expect children to be any better than we are, and even more unfair to cause them the physical pain and humiliation that accompanies corporal punishment. It is spectacularly ignorant to assume that a child will learn anything positive from corporal punishment. It serves only to teach a child of his or her own vulnerability in the face of someone larger, and enforces physical violence as a method of conflict resolution.
When debating this issue, there always seems to be a great number of people who feel that spanking prevents behaviour that could lead to serious consequences later on. Those who defend spanking often provide similar examples of said behaviour, such as a child running into traffic, stealing, hurting others, etc. However, if you really think back to your own childhood, or even watch other parents with their children, how often do these situations occur? If parents only used physical punishment as a deterrent to potentially harmful behaviour then it might indeed be somewhat effective. We all know that this ideal scenario is far from reality.
The fact is, spanking, hitting, or any other kind of corporal punishment is lazy parenting. Hitting someone who has displeased or disobeyed us is the easiest, and usually most satisfying, reaction. However, if we can't maintain control of our own impulses, how can we expect it of our children? If the only way to keep your child from running into the street is by hitting them, then obviously you haven't tried very hard.
Additionally, once the method of physical punishment begins it rarely ends. While much of the corporal punishment employed by parents may not fall under the category of abuse, the fact that there is no law against it leaves children prey to people who lack control, empathy, and sound judgment. Moreover, what human being, let alone an abusive parent, can claim total control, empathy, and sound judgment all of the time?
Children are the minority in our society in that they remain virtually the only citizens who do not have the benefit of human rights. Parents in North America reserve the right to punish their children as they see fit. While extreme cases of child abuse may eventually be discovered and dealt with, it is usually only after the child has already experienced a traumatic and potentially life-threatening amount of abuse.
For more information on the issue of corporal punishment and alternative methods of child discipline, go to http://www.nospank.n et/. This website was created by an organization called Parents and Teachers Against Violence in Education.
Learn more about this author, Mia Watson.
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