Yes

by Destiny Song

Created on: June 06, 2010

Since time immemorial, when men first discovered the club and women first discovered how to make dresses and jewelry, men have always tried to play the part of the 'knight in shining armour'. Cavemen with clubs, grew into knights with horses and lances, growing into revolutionaries with their rudimentary muskets, and finally evolving into the hardened gentlemen and soldiers we see today, and all to save the damsel in distress. Yet, men always saving the women and being nice whilst at it, whether from the economy, the dragon, or maybe the pterodactyl. And as women started to think of their own rights and independents, as they started to grasp the notion of equal rights, the question then arises; is old-fashioned chivalry and manners sexist?

In this debate, we'd firstly have to lay down some groundwork. 'Manners', in this context, should refer to chivalry and the 'manners' that man seem to show towards women but not towards their fellow men. If we were refering to common courtesy, then this debate would've had no point or connection; what does the courtesy of civilized society have to do with sexism? Without it, there'd be no civilization in the first place! 'Sexist' would then take on it's common definition without the sterotypical assosiation; that men and women were being treated unequally, whichever has the advantage. Contary to popular belief, if a woman was treated better than a man, it would still be considered sexist.

And in this context, I would believe strongly that 'manners' is sexist; however, this works to the advantage of the girls!

The evidence is obvious; just walk into any pub or cafe, and take a look at today's society. Take a look between the interaction of a two individuals of the same gender, and another of two of different genders. Men tend to treat women with courtesy which they would not show towards another male; holding a door open, speaking gently and softly; the tenderness which a male treats a female with would never be found between two male buddies. In fact, this unusual gentlemenly interaction between a male and female has been persistant in our society for such a long period of time, that we have even invented a word for it; chivalry. 

Chivalry is very easy to explain in the context of society and survival. Think of the basic purpose of all life and species on the planet; to reproduce and pass on the genes most conduicive for the survival of the species, for society. In this manner, all fertile males and females would seek out the best possible reproductive partner; this cause them to treat the opposite sex, whom they see as potential reproductive partners, better than they treat  individuals of the same sex, whom they see as potential rivals for the few available partners. Crude, perhaps, but reproduction and the instinct for species survival built into every one of our genes, is one of the main reasons why males and females will never be treated equally in any individual's eyes.

What we call civilization is merely an extention for the need to reproduce; by congregating as many humans as possible into a small land space, we not only manage to create safety in numbers so that no predators will threaten the reproductive process, but congregation also allows for better natural selection, for the strong to mate with the strong as far as posisble, and pass on the genes built inherently for survival.

To put it nicely, manners and chivalry are a gauge which women can use to gauge a guy, to see how stable and secure he is, as well as for a guy to impress a woman of equal or higher standing. To put it crudely, the sole purpose for manners and chivalry is for mating and reproductive purposes; for the woman to gauge the best male available for mating, and for the male to impress a woman of equal or higher social standing to mate with him and carry on his genes. Either way, when manners and chivalry towards the opposite sex is determined through raging hormones for selection of the perfect partner for mating, when mating is the ultimate distinction that males and females are not the same, and when it causes individuals to treat the opposite sex differently than they would treat another individual of the same sex; how can manners and chivalry be not considered sexist?

Learn more about this author, Destiny Song.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.