No

by Francis Harris

Created on: April 07, 2010

There is not a single best time of year to become a new mother, and even if there were it is unlikely that it would be the same universally across the world. Somethings that we think are important end up being totally inconsequential as we are thrust into our own unique journey of being a parent, in particular, a mother.

1. SCHOOLING

Some mothers worry about schooling. Before a child is even born they will calculate term dates and birthdays to make sure that their child stands the best chance of being included in this year or that year's intake. They worry about them being the oldest or the youngest in a class. They even look ahead at potential schools and what their current intake times are (at least for this year) so that they know the best time to be born to get the desired intake time.

A mother who gets pregnant just so that their child will be in a particular intake year at a particular school has a very narrow conception of both education and the unique needs of each child that develop during infancy. How devastating would it be to find the education system changes; or the child has special needs that mean the school of choice was not the best option. Maybe it would have been better for that mother to have waited, take those folic acid supplements for a little longer and get pregnant for a reason other than school intake times.

2. CLIMATIC COMFORT DURING PREGNANCY 

Some mothers think that the time of year is important to make sure pregnancy is as comfortable as it can be in their local climate. They point out how hard it is to be pregnant in the hot weather - when soaring temperatures and oppressive heat make the slightest movement impossibly hard and the heat exhausting on top of already being worn out. They advice get pregnant and have a baby in the cooler winter.

But if you plan a pregnancy based on how comfortably mild the climate will be during the pregnancy then you may be in for some BIG disappointments. The weather is by nature not predictable. The year you choose will almost certainly be an exception- either hotter or colder than normal. If you are pregnant in winter to save yourself an uncomfortable summer pregnancy then that will be the year of freak snow-storms that cut you off and make transport impossible at a time when you need frequent hospital visits! You'd wish for a mild summer instead!

Then should you choose a winter baby you suddenly find that night breast feeding in cold dark rooms is impossibly hard. You wish that you'd had a summer baby - and endured those potentially hot exhausting days of pregnancy - so that you could easily hop in and out of bed and feed in the night without chilling drafts and cold rooms to face. You can't win when it comes to climate.

3. TAX BREAKS AND FINANCIAL INCENTIVES

Some mothers plan babies on financial tax breaks! They wisely calculate when is the best time for a break in work, or a drop in income, so that financial impact on the family is minimized. Having a pregnancy that straddles the end of tax year becomes the main focus - especially if there is to be a break from work before and after the baby. That gap can be spread out in the two tax years (just as if you had a 12 month contract you would also want to straddle tax years and pay a smaller percentage of tax for the same amount of work because you had less income in each year and would fall into the lowest tax threshold for each year instead of the highest for one).

But when we think only of finances we have often lost the importance of parenthood. Yes it is important to provide for the new child but material provision is not the only thing that a child needs. That mother may be better off thinking of lifestyle changes that would allow her (or her husband) to be stay-at-home parents and not need so much money. The child would benefit far more from a stay-at-home parent than they would from a larger family income and more material possessions because mum got pregnant at the "right" time of year.

4. HOLIDAYS AND ANNIVERSARIES

Sometimes mothers get pregnant to fit around certain holidays and anniversaries. If Christmas is a busy and important time the mother may especially want, or not want, to have a baby at that time. Festivals and holidays of other cultures may carry similar significance and mean a mother would like, or not, to have a baby at that time.

Once again planning a baby around a festival takes a very short-sighted view of parenthood. The cultural occasion of celebration is very likely local to the region. Should there ever be a change in circumstance (eg change of location of family for employment) then the long-term plan to avoid or hit a certain cultural festival is just non-sense.

5. UNNECESSARY WORRY AND LONG-TERM COMPLICATIONS

Mothers who try to get pregnant at certain times of the year - for whatever reason - face unnecessary worry and stress when it doesn't happen. Their life is diminished because their bodies are not doing what they want them to do! And sometimes this can cause long term psychological or emotional trouble for the women.

Also the woman may only try to fall pregnant at a certain time - and so stop trying for another year - and actually end up having a baby when it is biologically not the optimum time (ie she is older than would be desirable!). It would have been far better to just try for a pregnancy, relaxed and comfortable, and accept the child when ever conceived. Such "acceptance" will go a long way in her future relationship with the child

CONCLUSION

There are many reasons that mothers may think of that make it seem so important to have a baby at a certain time of year. None of them are valid when held up against the basic commitment the mother must make to conceiving a child in the first place. Once she is ready for the on-going commitment of being a parent it makes no difference whatsoever whether the child is born spring, summer, autumn or winter or any time in between. Her basic commitment to her child will overcome any hurdles that may be faced because of some non-optimal circumstance; a mother should look to whether she has that commitment, not anything else.

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