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Cheating Spouses & Affairs
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| Yes | 73% | 30 votes | Total: 41 votes | |
| No | 27% | 11 votes |
Yes
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Add to FavoritesAny sin is forgivable, but on a sliding scale, how forgivable is cheating?
First of all, let's examine the word "cheat." Was there deceit, trickery, artifice or fraud in the act? We do not "own" our partners but we can expect a certain amount of fidelity from them ... in any kind of friendship. What is love, but friendship caught on fire? But what if we find that the relationship we trusted so much had been all fire and no friendship? That would certainly be hard to forgive - but not impossible. First we'd have to let go and examine the other from afar. In a situation like that, it would be impossible to stay close and have any kind of good feeling about the cad. Yes "cad." Maybe in time, after some sense of closure had been achieved that person may feel inclined to re-approach as a true friend - or not. But be very careful!
Adultery without artifice falls into another category. Maybe we are expecting too much of the person we are with. Perhaps they are simply not ready for the level of commitment we are ready for. Perhaps we are simply not a match - even if we each gave it our best shot.
It is when deception creeps in that we need to really consider the other's motives. First of all, if you are involved with or married to a philanderer, he should come clean about it early on, and not lead you on to think that he is the faithful type. Then, it is your decision whether or not to stay in the relationship.
The same is true for men who are involved with a promiscuous woman. If she is playing the field, you have a right to know early on.
Maybe those errant partners can settle down in time, but it helps to know what one is getting into and to arrive at decisions accordingly. Relationships are always an investment sprinkled with uncertainty, as there is always free-will involved. Who knows what the future may bring, but know what you want before leaping into the unknown with 007 or his female counterpart.
Personally, I believe in monogamous relationships, but do allow for a fall or two. Perfection is not all.
Of course cheating can be forgiven. The real question is whether or not there is any good or justifiable reason to stay in the relationship and only you or your partner can answer that.
Learn more about this author, Violet Fortune.
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No
Before I begin justifying my side, I'd ask, What makes a person cheat? And, the reasons are all evil. Either it is to revenge a cheating partner or a momentary physical or emotional attraction. It is at times simply a means to fulfill a longing desire that is extremely selfish.
Are there any more reasons to cite? Ponder and tell me one good reason that makes a person eligible to cheat.
Now, what do you call a person who shoplifts? He picks things without telling the shop owner. Why? Simply because his wants outweigh his moral values. He could ask the shop owner for what he wants and if the reasons were genuine, no one would be hard-hearted enough not to donate for a justified cause.
Same goes with cheating your partner. If we called the shoplifter a thief, the cheater is a thief, too. You too are stealing the faith and love of your partner and the new-found love just to meet your selfish desires. If not that, then perhaps to fill the void of boredom!
Now, how ethical is that? How can you look up to yourself and respect yourself ever after? If you can give in to any weak moment, you are not a person enough!
Once committed, stay committed. Don't cheat not at least till you are together. Leave your partner, and do all that you want to -openly!
Maintain transparency. Let your partner know what they lack or can do better to help save your companionship, than finding alternatives. If nothing works out, better separate.
Be strong; face it and stand up to your commitment.
Your partner may have sacrificed a lot to be with you. Honor that and be kind enough to let your partner know your intentions so as to prepare them for the forthcoming troubles ahead of time.
No way will you be respected any longer, but yes if your partner truly loves you, you may get another chance.
Control your impulses.
Control your mind, polish your conscience, awaken your wisdom and then judge the situation before taking another step in the wrong direction.
Would you really be able to respect yourself in future after having spent a night with someone else? How would you feel if your partner did the same?
If it does not affect you, chances are that you have stopped too low to be able judge the difference between right and wrong. While your partner may forgive you, you can't and will never be able forgive yourself ever after.
Cheating is and will always be an unforgivable sin.
Learn more about this author, RichaArora.
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