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Is it responsible for a parent to let a 12-year-old child ride the NYC subway alone?
Is it responsible for a parent to let a 12-year-old child ride the NYC subway alone?
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| Yes | 34% | 135 votes | Total: 397 votes | |
| No | 66% | 262 votes |
Yes
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Add to FavoritesWe live in a dangerous world. Our children are growing up in a dangerous society. Some day, they will be on their own in this society. Unfortunately, by the time are children are ready to tackle the world on their own, it will have gotten worse, not better.
While I can't bear the thought of allowing my child to ride the subway alone, it isn't irresponsible. If the child's parents have equipped the child with the knowledge he needs to know when to run, how to find help and how to avoid obvious trouble, then there is nothing wrong with this child's independence. Sheltering our children and protecting them from the evils in the world isn't going to make the world a better place. It isn't going to keep our children any more safe either.
The fact is, the same violence and victimization a child can befall on the subway, can easily be wrought upon that child at school or in the mall. We live in a violent world. Our children have to survive in this world. Certainly a child of 12 will know how to handle himself later in life from the simple learning experiences he had as a child. Including ride the subway alone. We send our children to schools with metal detectors and bars on the windows. The environment is less than ideal, but we don't have much choice. Just as our children will have no choice as they grow, but to live their life despite the dangers of the world. If they are prepared to face those dangers, they will fare better.
If we force our children to depend on us indefinitely because we fear for them, we do them a great injustice. We raise children who are afraid because they have not been exposed to the dangers of our society. We raise naive children who cannot immediately recognize a dangerous situation when they see one. We send our children into society ill prepared for what awaits them. Our children will have to survive in this world, and we should be doing everything possible to prepare them for that.
In NYC, the subway system is almost vital to everyone living there. At 12 years old, a child who can navigate the subway system easily, knows where each line will take him, and knows what platforms to avoid at certain time of the day, will be safer than some adults who travel the same system clueless everyday. Giving a 12 year old child independence, as long as it is supplemented with safety practices and parents who will know if their child is two hours late, is never irresponsible. It prepares the child for the world, and that is our job as parents. Isn't it?
Learn more about this author, Belinda Long.
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No
Is it responsible for a parent to let a 12-year-old child ride the NYC subway alone?
I believe it is totally irresponsible to let a 12-year-old child ride the subway alone. Some point out that we overprotect our children and we do not allow them the opportunity to venture alone. Is that why so many of our children are abducted, raped, killed, or traumatized? But, I guess some of these are the same children we want to charge as adults if they do something wrong, or do something illegal. Sometimes, I think, do we have standards?
Some of our children really are "just children." They need their mommies to tuck them in at night and they need their daddies to say it is okay to be frightened of the dark or scared of the bogeyman. They need us-adults-to be adults and show them the way, guide them and protect them. Some children are mature for their ages and are very responsible. Some children have to be responsible because they have immature and irresponsible parents. But in a loving family, I think the answer should be no. It is not responsible to let a child, that young, ride the subway alone. I certainly would not let my 12-year-old child ride the subway alone-in any city!
Some parents will argue that their child could and does ride the subway. Some parents argue that it's good for the child to explore and that we should trust that they will have good judgment and make good choices. Some people point out that we overprotect our children and we do not allow them the opportunity to venture alone. Fine, if you feel that way, but I don't believe that. And, I also love the responsible child. But what about the predators? What about the pedophiles? What about other children (gang-related, for example) that prey upon innocents? What about them?
Is that why so many of our children are abducted, raped, killed, or traumatized?Can that responsible child know how to handle these types of incidents/scenarios? Can you? I guess some of these are the same children we want to charge as adults if they do something wrong. What standards do we have? What's wrong with us? Can we provide safety for our children while riding public transportation?
If so, then yes, I agree, let them ride alone. I am very tired of people telling me we can't change the world. If we can't make our outdoors and our cities transportation systems safe for our children, then what can we change? And for those that feel we have overprotected our children, let them know that "that is okay to do." We are allowed, thank God, to overprotect them.
We're also allowed to over-provide for them. We are allowed to love them with all our might and we are allowed to ride the damned NYC subway with them!
Learn more about this author, Elinda Harrison.
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