Do women feel pressured into losing weight quickly after giving birth?

Yes

9 of 9

by Nancy Todisco

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I'll never forget the delirium over the conception of my first child, and the adrenaline rush to announce my pregnancy on a world-wide forum; after all, wasn't I truly the first "real" woman in the world to give birth, so perfectly, so willingly, and so "by the books" ? Naturally, I had to escort my then flat little tummy down to storm the local bookstore and purchase every Novel on pregnancy and what to expect, when you're expecting. I firmly vowed that I would look like that model on the cover of the pregnancy bible I purchased, "Pregnant and Beautiful". My skin would be glowing luminously, my mane of hair would be glossy and full, my nails would be perfectly manicured a bubble bath pink french manicure, and aside from my tiny swollen tummy, no one would hardly know I was pregnant.

In my naivety of pregnant delirium, I also assumed that I had a license to eat. How sweet, after years of nautilus equipment, workout world, and denying myself every satisfying succulent sweet; the pregnancy party was about to begin. I was never one to refuse a good party; I had to partake. So the eating began, from late night pizza's, accompanied by a tall glass of milk of course (the pregnancy bible encourage ample Calcium), to oatmeal cookies (well, oatmeal is a good source of fiber, and the raisins were so nutritious, how could I go wrong?), to just about every delectable food that I had denied myself for 24 years. I earned that license, I deserved it; I was pregnant and beautiful...wasn't I ?

Fast forward to 9 months, and an embracing 60 pounds later, and although I still remained pregnant, I wasn't quite as "pregnant and beautiful" as the bible promised me. I was edging more towards "pregnant and plump" than any picture on the cover of that then repulsive Novel. By the ninth month, I had convinced myself that the girl on the cover wasn't really pregnant anyway; why weren't her ankles swollen, why didn't she have my two chins? That must have been it...she was airbrushed into "pregnant and beautiful", she was pregnant by means of a computer animation,yes...she was having a cyber pregnancy! I was a real woman, I was having a truly "American Woman's " pregnancy; which included lots of fruit, protein and various member of the "Ito" family....you know the ones...Dor"itos", Fr"itos", "Cheeto's, etc.

After 35 hours of labor, and a beautiful 7 pound, 2 ounce bouncing baby boy.....I was elated, exhausted and overweight. I couldn't believe that his seven pounds didn't compensate for my sixty! How dare he come into this world, without negating my weight gain.

I quickly and begrudgingly went back to my pregnancy bible to peruse the chapter on after the baby was born. Surely, the pregnancy model in the book had a swollen belly, and round cheeks like I did! Wrong again, she had a six pack, the same glowing cheeks, and her hair even appeared longer post-pregnancy; probably because her face was so gaunt, in sharp contrast to my little cherub cheeks. I cursed her, she wasn't even pregnant, yet she remained beautiful. And she wasn't alone! Everywhere I sought confirmation for my "love handles", I found instead skinny supermodels, flat tummy post- partum workout videos, and just a general population of friends and family, awed by the fact, that my weight hadn't "fallen off" of me; like it did their girlfriend, their granddaughter, their neighbor.

I discovered the world isn't kind to women after childbirth. The world holds the infant in awe, embraces the offspring, encourages future reproduction; but it just take kindly to women who don't have the will-power to "take it all off", after "packing it all on" during pregnancy. The world is funny that way.

So here I am, four children later, and a shadow of my former body. I know it is hidden in there somewhere, and I have been searching for it like a precious hidden treasure. I know eventually, I will loose that "baby fat", even if my baby is now 21 year old. Sadly, I am still struggling to loose that first jubilant weight gain; I must admit it was lovely having a license to finally eat after so many years of youthful deprivation. I just wish someone would have told me that it wouldn't fall off, along with the umbilical cord.

I still wouldn't change a thing that life has offered me and the road I took to arrive. Yes, it would be wonderful to be sharing couture clothing with my eighteen year old daughter, and I will always be battling the bulge, in an effort to live long enough to see my own granchildren and their mom's "pregnant and beautiful". Someday, I'm sure, I'll reach that "goal weight", but if I don't, I have already confirmed that beauty isn't a dress size, or a waist size, it remains within the size of your heart.

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