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| Yes | 54% | 559 votes | Total: 1036 votes | |
| No | 46% | 477 votes |
Yes
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Add to FavoritesExpression of affection and feelings of love can take many shapes and forms. There are those that feel it is best expressed through spoken words, those that express it through writing and then even those that express it through acts of service. It really depends on the individual's frame of reference and worldview or "Weltbild", doesn't it? Any way you look at this, the expression of love is a form of communication. Some people have a tendency to overcommunicate, while others undercommunicate. In the case of saying "I love you", it is certainly possible to overcommunicate.
While it can be argued that one can never express love towards another excessively as long as the recipient has the same feelings towards you, it is a fact that overcommunication is possible. For example, my wife and best friend on this journey through life together appreciates being told that I love her each day as she wants the reassurance that this man truly loves and thinks about her. She does not want to be forgotten, and I in turn get a sense of satisfaction that I'm making her life better by reassuring her. This is goodness.
On the other side of the coin, I have observed situations where saying "I love you" too much turns into a borderline obsessive compulsive behavior. For example, my eleven year old step-son has within the past year gotten into the habit of saying, "Love you." to his mother many multiple times throughout the day. He could be sitting downstairs in front of the television or XBOX game, while his mother is in the den upstairs on Facebook or the phone and we would hear him declare in a somewhat monotonous tone, "Love you." several times in a row, and perhaps 5 to 10 times within a half an hour. To me the repetitive nature of this has started to become more of an annoyance, rather than a very meaningful expression of parent/child affection. One cannot question the strong bond between a child and his/her mother; however, there should be a point at which there is more independence for a child. Case in point - yes, here is an example where it is being overdone!
For my personal communication style, I believe it is important to say, "I love you." when you are finishing a phone conversation with a loved one, or leaving them for the day, departing, etc. It is also nice to have the impromptu "I love you" from your partner or loved one out of the blue. It tends to become an issue when it comes across as being mechanical, overdone or out of context. Context is the operative word here. My step-son's constant "Love you" reminder to his mother every 5 minutes makes me question the context. He is a loving and bright child, but how could his mother, whom he is very close to have forgotten that he loves her in only five minutes?
In summary, as children we are all brought up in different environments, and communication style is something that is taught or 'adopted' depending on our surrounding environment. Once we strike out into the world on our own and get involved in the act of building new relationships and families outside of the environment of our upbringing, that is the time when we should evaluate our communication style and forms of expression. It would make great sense to question the effectiveness (or even overeffectiveness) of our inherent style of expression of love, and then adjust it somewhat to be in balance with your new family or relationship situation. This of course takes time and doesn't happen overnight. It is something that like all good things requires time to grow. In closing, I would submit to you that one can say, "I love you." too much; however, one can never overdo 'showing' another their love. It's all about having a balanced way of expressing this.
Learn more about this author, Roland Ludwig.
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No
"I love you," is one of the most least used phrases in society today. It needs to be used much more, especially today with all of the problems that the world is facing. More divorces and separations are occuring due to financial distress and more will occur if the U.S. government does not get the financial crisis under control. This does not mean that we have to use this phrase when we talk about the U.S. government, but it should be used between friends, family and loved ones more often than ever.
There is no way that such a phrase should be used less. We should let one another know exactly how we feel. Husbands and wives, no matter how long they have been married should definitely say these words as much as they can. This does not mean that you, the husband, has to bring a box of chocolate or a diamond ring home with you each and every day after work, but saying these words should mean all the world to your significant other. This goes for calling your mother and/or father no matter what you think about them and saying, "Mom, dad, I love you." This should be used as much as possible because we have to remember they conceived us, they raised us, gave us a roof over our head and sent us to school. They gave us our allowance when we did what we were asked to do and they punished us when we did something wrong. We should thank them for this as it taught us to be better children and taught us what it would be like when we become and/or became parents.
There are many ways to say "I love you," but there is no better way to say it then with words. Cards are nice once in a while. A small gift is nice, once in a while. But we do feel so much better when we hear it as words. Words can be very powerful in both good and bad ways. We have to do everything we can to control our emotions when they turn bad. When we argue or want to argue with our friends, family and loved ones, try this on for size, "I love you very much, but we have to discuss this as adults. We have to work things out and not let anyone tell us otherwise."
No matter who you are and no matter where you are, let the people you know, whether it be family, church, loved ones and those you have contact with everyday, that you love them. This does not mean to walk into your bosses office and say, "Boss, you have been so good to me, I love you." This could get you in a lot of trouble! LOL.
Learn more about this author, David Brown.
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