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Add to FavoritesAs a child I lived on a quiet street block. Woodvale, our street, was a long block interrupted occasionally by intersecting streets. Our section of the block was interrupted by an intersecting street named Philmay Terrace and so myself, my sister, and the rest of the kids on our section were able to have an island unto ourselves. It was an island we defended furiously with our plastic guns, swords, shields, US Army issued(by way of Mattel) grenades and the rootin' tootinest six shooter and ammunition belt the Wild Wild West had ever seen. We challenged the other sections of Woodvale Avenue to games of 'War'. We fought desperadoes in ten gallon black cowboy hats. We stopped the Empire and the Death Star with our Han Solo replica BlasTech DL-44 blasters and Obi Wan's lightsaber. As children, we played, and we played hard and at times what we were playing involved weapons. While we were holding back the oncoming Indian attack against our cattle ranch with our sheriff badges affixed to our vests and popping off our six shooters neither were we aware of the violence going on around us nor did we realize any sort of impact shooting Kevin as he was howling and swinging his rubber tomahawk might have on our psyches.
We should be glad if children want to use toys. Using toys might imply a child's imagination might be stoked up and firing. In our digital world we have forgone with make believe to have someone else think of it for us. Playstations, X-Box's and whatever other gaming outlet has done to our children's imaginations what the Chris Gaines persona did for Garth Brooks. The ones making these games are the same kids who were playing and imagining and being allowed to be a kid. Today we are so fearful our kids might be using a fake ray gun, shooting suction cup arrows, or using anything Nerf makes we would rather have them perched in front of the television set slowly developing hyperopia and carpal tunnel syndrome. Well at least they didn't pretend to shoot anyone? They also gained 30 pounds over the weekend and have a diminished ability to imagine scenario's in their mind. Good thing we took those guns away!
Parents have taken all the fun out of being a kid. Being a kid involves scraped knees and a good dose of stained clothing. Being a kid involves using a magnifying glass to burn things, like ants. Being a kid means staring out a window for a few hours doing nothing but daydreaming and imagining. Being a kid means the routine trip into the fantasies swirling around the brain and implementing a variety of toys to assist them in those worlds, including a weapon if need be. A toy gun is just what it says it is, a toy. It only becomes something more when Danny's over protective slightly neurotic and completely reactionary mom and dad explain how the toy could lead Danny down the path of killing his classmates in high school and his own suicide. Billy can't play 'Ninjas' with Bobby because maybe by playing with that toy sword and throwing stars Billy's parents explain to him he is headed for a life of alcohol addiction, abuse, and potential jail time.
We see violence all over the television. We go to violent movies. We buy violent video games for our kids. Cartoons are violent. Comic books are violent. The evening news should be rated TV-MA for the amount of violence on their broadcasts. Standing by us while we are being numbed to this portrayed violence? Our kids. This is the world our kids are in. Jet Li movies and Grand Theft Auto part 12, and the 11 o'clock news yet toy guns, knives, throwing stars, or any other toy weapon are believed to be leading kids to a life of crime and incarceration. A study by Pat Robertson or some gun hating radical as kooky as his counterparts on the other side of the aisle write an article about the downfall of kids due to violent toys and parents lose their minds and kids lose their toys. If kids are resilient enough to deal with the news at 6 and the 'Punisher War Zone' then leading troops from the shores into hostile enemy territory with their Nerf repeating suction cup blaster should be okay despite what Pat says about it.
Instead of trying to foretell the potential future for their kid who happens to be enjoying shooting his rubber pelleted handgun at cans in the backyard we should be explaining reality to our kids. The reality of a toy weapon is it is a toy. Plain and simple. It won't kill anyone and it will only really do any damage to those with a strong enough imagination. We need to explain to our kids the dangers of real weapons while explaining it is okay to pretend with toy weapons.
Why don't we stop violent video games? Who is halting the stream of cartoons that depict violence? When will we finally put our foot down and end the 'Breaking News' portion of our local news? Why? Because these things are taken in context of what they are. Toy weapons need the same context. Parents are suffocating their children's imagination in a vain attempt to keep them "safe". Kids are absorbing. Everyday they are taking more things in and everyday they are losing some things in order to make room for the new stuff. Will they carry their dreams of one day conquering the West on a horse and wearing a black mask? Probably not. Just like their space wars fought with a Kenner repeating blaster cannon won't be leading them to sociopathic murder in their teens. Parents seem to forget they were once those kids and now they are denying their children the fun they had as kids.
A few weeks ago I bought three Styrofoam samurai swords. One hilt was red, the other green, the other yellow. I bought three because my six year old daughter and her three year old sister and I wanted to be ninjas. I didn't sway them to the Hello Kitty section or walk to the middle of the mall for a wheat grass smoothie. I bought the three swords and we dueled as we walked out of the mall. I explained to them to watch for head shots and crotch shots on daddy. I explained where we played with these swords(no living room or dining room) and how we stop if someone accidentally got hurt while we were playing. I also explained how Styrofoam, while making an excellent parrying weapon, certainly was not a real sword in any way. Real swords really hurt. We don't play with nor do we really hurt anyone. We didn't need the 700 Club or Mothers against whatever it is they are against. We played swords, we played ninjas. I spent a few hours rolling around the floor, making forts and laughing with my daughters as we pretended in our imaginary bases. So you ask, 'Should we allow our children to play with toy weapons?' Why don't you ask my two little ninjas what they think?
Learn more about this author, Jimmy Ettele.
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No
Why does a child play with a doll? Or a miniature car? Or a plastic gun? Because the child is able through the interaction with the toy to express his or her feelings or experiences. The young girl who picks up a doll and dresses it for its little tea party is allowing her imagination to take her to a place where she has control over the scenario of a party. The little boy who sends his little sports car spinning across the room is perhaps seeing himself in his father's shoes as he drove home from work that day. Or perhaps he is reenacting that car chase he saw on television. The little boy who shoots the gun at his teddy bear seated at the corner is perhaps putting himself in that scene in which he punishes his teddy bear for its wrong doing.
Should we watch the games our children play and worry about some of the trends? I believe so because play is an extension of the child's experiences and a way for the child to explore his environment. When a child begins tearing her doll apart, I would worry about the violence she feels;the frustration she is venting against the doll. It is really not so different from the way art can offer a psychological profile of the child. When a child's dabbling in art showcases violence, we wonder if there is something in the child's experiences that is triggering that response.
Is a toy gun or sword simply a tool for imaginative play? It could be. For some well adjusted children, these are simply fun toys to run around with. The games that are played here could be no different from playing Tag. A few years ago, my young kids received a set of high tech guns with sensors that could be strapped to their bodies. When shot at with the toy gun, the sensor would light up if you got a direct hit. Certainly, my kids enjoyed the game tremendously. They ran themselves silly trying to stay alive, devised tactics to overpower their "enemy' and generally had a great deal of fun.
But I wouldn't have bought the game for them myself. I don't approve of my children yelling "I'm going to kill you!" or "You're dead!" I don't think such language is appropriate. But is it possible to play such games without the use of such language? I don't think so. The nature of such toys does not allow the child to play a game that demonstrates love and patience and cooperation - the types of values our children should be developing.
And so as they played their shooting game, I had to carefully monitor the values they portrayed. It is one thing to allow a healthy sense of competitiveness to thrive. It is another to see a child out to intimidate another.
Of course, this parental duty to monitor our children's play should see itself played out in all scenarios, whether the child is playing with his Lego set or his sword set. A friend of mine refuses to allow her young daughter to play with Barbie dolls because she disapproves of the sexist stereotyping of the doll. But it is possible to play with the dolls without perpetuating this stereotyping. The parent can talk the child through her experiences and make them positive learning opportunities.
What is child's play all about? It is an opportunity for the child to use his imagination, to grow in his experiences, to test out new environments and scenarios. The healthy child places himself in various roles and explores how he fits into them. Do we need for our children to explore the world of violence? What good would it do them? Given the choice, I would encourage them to explore the multitude of other playful environments.
I have spoken about the parental responsibility to monitor our children's play. But are all children monitored? Unfortunately, no. The sad image comes to mind of the young children who picked up a gun they had found at home and used it against another innocent child. An unfortunate accident? Today, some guns look so real they even confuse sensors at the airports. And violence is portrayed in the media so frequently, even in cartoons, that it is a serious influence on a child's experience. An experience that the child could explore further through play.
Why do we want to place our children in this position? Shouldn't we be encouraging the child's ability to differentiate between play and the real world? And shouldn't we be nurturing positive values that naturally develop through play. I believe so. And because of that, I wouldn't ever intentionally purchase a toy weapon for my child. And if he got one as a gift, I wouldn't be so paranoid as to throw it away in disgust. Rather, I would use it as an opportunity to explore the positive experiences that could come out of that play. If anything, it could be the perfect opportunity to discuss why violence can never solve our problems.
Learn more about this author, Judith Morais.
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