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| No | 92% | 722 votes | Total: 786 votes | |
| Yes | 8% | 64 votes |
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Add to FavoritesMotherhood doesn't need to spell the end to an ardent writer. Young Moms head off to gym or dance classes, further education courses etc., with their little ones left in the capable hands of creche-carers. Others may work in a paid capacity while their children are being well looked after. All around the world, Moms need to work with innovative plans to create new opportunities for themselves, and the message is that you can too!
Remember it's you at the helm and steering your very own lifestyle! Little changes can make big differences as to where we venture and what we can achieve throughout our lives. If you truly are passionate about writing, there can be many ways to make adjustments within your daily or weekly schedule, to also encompass some really valuable time for you to devote specifically to your craft.
Sure, it's true that motherhood brings various demands on our lifestyles with seemingly endless reasons day and night, to attend to a myriad of chores, duties and commitments. It really doesn't have to stop there though because you're in control here. Depending on the ages of your children and the duties that you must devote to daily, consider options that can be swapped for what could then become, precious and rewarding, writing moments. Sounding good isn't it! These could be periods to write during the day or evening, whatever works best for you and those who can work with your new timetable.
* Maybe it means not watching a couple of television shows some days or nights. They weren't that particularly interesting anyway? You may have found them an opportunity to sit back finally and unwind more than anything. Swap these for an allotment of me-time that will become more productive.
* Discuss with a friend who has children in similar age-group and enjoy one another's company, that maybe you each could take turns to mind the children for a play-period together on a regular basis. This exchange offers each of you some valuable free time of your own. Make it simple and suggest children bring their own "eats"; all you need to do is offer the supervision of play. If they already have their morning-tea or lunch it's not a difficult option that could work for you and your writing freedom, on your day off.
* Phone calls; do you really need to phone "just because" to chat so often? If phone calls take up valuable time, you could be using those minutes which can collectively accumulate into hours during the week, to write some instead. Just be sure to let your frequently-called friends or family know why you will be spending less time with phone calls. Take your phone off the hook or put onto message-service when you're writing too, so there's definitely no distractions.
* This might be an expensive option, but worth adding. Shopping for groceries takes lots of time when you think about the getting ready and then to and from the store alone. It costs in fuel too, so perhaps you could save this allocation of time by ordering online and having your groceries delivered to your door instead. Shopping online is straight-forward and hassle-free. If the cost is a little beyond your budget then maybe it might work for you on a monthly basis only?
Finding suitable alternatives to being Mom full-time doesn't mean you're dropping out at all. It's an opportunity to become someone special, your own person with a young family AND a passion to write. Your little ones are also very likely valuable source material to write about too! There will always be new Moms who will be keen to read any new articles that relate to their days and ways with children as well. You can definitely hold onto your creative connections by simply, writing when you can.
Learn more about this author, Carole Meisenhelter.
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Yes
Yes, being a mother, especially to very young children, can spell the end of writing, depending on how creative you really are. Children can pull and pull at you until you find yourself so-and-so's MOTHER, rather than Sally, writer, Mary, artist or whoever you were before. It's very easy to fall into the motherhood all or nothing mentality. But it isn't healthy for you or the kids. Because I am a bit low in the creativity area, I have only come up with a few ways a mother can get anything done, let alone write.
Young children are very needy, of course. Mothers have to tend to them 24/7 especially when they are infants. It's pretty hard to multi-task while breastfeeding, changing and doing laundry. Then there is the extra cleaning, bathing, and entertaining involved. As they get a bit older, they need supervision so as not to get into mischief, your purse or the toilet. Soon, it's your attention they crave no matter what they have to do to get it, good or bad. Did I mention potty training, doctor's visits, and birthday parties? So, in terms of a child's needs it's near impossible to write.
Being a mother can be all consuming for some. They choose to give up careers, friends, and even their previous role as a wife or mother, just to make sure the kids have a great life. It can become almost an obsession with some mothers. These are women who feel they must sacrifice everything (or at least do other things halfway) to be great moms. Of course, these moms wouldn't take time out to write, either.
When I bluntly explain things like this, it's easy to see from the outside that it isn't healthy for the mom or the kids to be so interdependent. The mom, an adult, needs to actually out herself first, at least sometimes. This will refresh her for her kids. It will also teach her kids to take care of themselves first. Having a burned out mom is no fun.
Unfortunately, I voted "yes" that motherhood really does spell the end of writing because in my experience I have only come up with five ways for a mom to get anything done and they aren't great:
1) Hire someone else to do it. OK, this may not apply to writing, but you get my drift.
2) Pay a babysitter. This is not an option for a surprisingly large number of moms, due to financial or other issues. Besides, have you ever heard of someone hiring a sitter so they can write? Maybe if you're Nora Roberts and it's WORK.
3) Use the TV as a babysitter. How do you think I am writing this? Thank you, Barney.
4) Don't sleep. Many moms do this and it isn't healthy.
5) Let the baby cry. My least favorite, but sometimes a mom has to go to the bathroom.
I suppose there are some other more creative ideas out there on the "no" side and I will surely read them. Maybe I can get some sleep then.
Learn more about this author, Maggie Madison.
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