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Defiance in teens: Angst or mental disorder?
Results so far:
| Angst | 92% | 249 votes | Total: 272 votes | |
| Mental Dis | 8% | 23 votes |
Angst
by Jimmy Ettele
Created on: December 19, 2008
There is an epidemic surging throughout kids ages 13-19. Nationwide, quite possibly even worldwide, the affliction of defiance is crippling our teenagers across the globe. What could be the cause? Why would our teenagers be hit so hard with this defiance? Quite possibly we could be looking at a true medical condition. We could be ignoring sure signs of some type of adolescent mental disorder? Then again, if we all take a step back, close our eyes, and take a deep breath, at the tail end of our exhale and as our eyes open, maybe we will see a different picture of what is the cause of defiance in teens?
Even now, Merck and Pfizer are scrambling their respective teams together attempting, at the expense of many a lab rat, to develop a pill that will cure defiance in teens. At the risk of nausea, dizziness, shortness of breath, vomiting, liver failure, constipation, and potential death in minor cases, our pharmaceutical monopolies are on the case for parents around the world. And though these pill companies shirk in the face of potentially death inducing side effects from their drugs, we can not even place blame on the pharmaceutical companies. Our twenty four hour a day news cycles, Wolf Blitzer chatting with a hologram, political pushes for pharmaceutical needs, and blogs have this country and it's citizenry completely neurotic and over reacting to any news they stream on their Blackberries. Two years ago Bird Flu was on the precipice of effects not seen since the Black Plague. Before that West Nile Virus threatened all of humanity. Seven year olds who can't sit still in their chairs are labeled ADD and given a prescription for Ritalin. If you're older than seven then you get an extra letter ascribed to your condition, you get to be ADHD. Congratulations. You're tired three or four days out of the week, you must have sleepapnia. You've surpassed the age of retirement and have nothing to do at home, you're given a blue pill and your wife is alerted. This country has halted allowance for nature to move forward with it's plans with heavy dosages of doctor's scripts.
Defiance in teenagers does not spring from a well of mental disorders. Defiance in teenagers springs from the angst all teenagers feel or have felt throughout those tumultuous years between thirteen and nineteen. Teenagers are defiant because along with the extra hair, their vocal changes, and intensifying odor, teenage angst is apart of growing up. Teens are discovering who they are going to be. Confined within the boundaries of their teen years, their bodies are molting. They are going through physical transformations they have not gone through since they were babies. They have acne, body odor, hair all over the place, they are awkward, confused, and insecure. Teenagers have hormones racing through their bodies like a Nascar driver without a speed limiter. The flow of changes taking place is cause for defiance. Teenagers get to have parents who either do not understand the changes or try to hard to understand the changes. They have parents more interested in text messages, spray on tans, and ignoring dialog or communication with their kids preferring to throw some medicine at them instead. Is it any wonder, with all the stresses going on around them and a perceived lack of support, why teenagers would be defiant?
Teenagers become defiant as a way of expressing themselves. They find themselves still unequipped to properly put into words their emotions. Their defiance marks a defense mechanism triggered to combat against undesirable persons and unwanted advice. Parents, friends, teachers, anyone who poses a potential annoyance or threat seems to be the one targeted by a teenagers defiance and that is okay. This is what teenagers are supposed to be doing. As their parents, we should not be overreacting to our teenagers defiance. Our kids do not need a prescription for Zanex. Our kids need parents who are smart enough to get involved when needed and back off when they are not. Our kids need parents who understand not the specific situations going on with Buffy and Tad's relationship woes. Those sorts of situations are handled best by a teenager's peers. Parents are not here to become friends with their teenagers. Parents are here to be a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, a voice of reason, and the unconditional love our teenagers say they don't want but so desperately need.
The last thing any of us needs is another pill for another completely natural ailment. It is bad enough right now trying to watch television what with every other commercial showing two people sitting in tubs on a mountain or a CGI bee explaining how much you need nose spray, we do not need another aimed at our teenagers. There is enough pressure with drugs and teenagers, why would we need something else to put into their mouths?
Teen defiance is not caused by any sort of mental disorder. Teen defiance is stoked early on. Right about after your newly crowned thirteen year old is done blowing out all the candles on their cake, their defiance is building. Let us not give our children another reason to feel insecure or unsure of themselves by making them think there is something wrong with them. Blaming a mental disorder only goes to plant more doubt in people who are already filled up to the nose with self doubt. For just one second, let's click Wolf Blitzer off, settle down a bit, and explain to our children what they are feeling is natural. Let them know they don't need another pill to be taken once daily before their first meal to cure what ails them. What they need is time to figure out themselves, figure out the people around them, become comfortable with who they are. Their 20th birthday would sure be a welcomed sight too but until then we'll hold off on the pills and disorders.
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Mental Dis
by J. Renda
Created on: July 13, 2008
As a parent of three, this topic definately has been a long running debate in the household of my own as well as many other parents with defiant teens. As a parent of two defiant teens, there are many different options society tries to push. One of which is prescription drugs. It is true that in some instances that there are individuals out there that go undiagnosed. With mental disorders such as Bipolar II, the longer the individual goes undiagnosed the more potential damage can be done to the human mind. The chemical inbalance can actually produce more symptoms and change in the way the manic and mania cycles quite rappidly without treatment. Often there are others that are diagnosed with Bipolar II, or Schizophrenia that really exhibit symptoms more true to Alcohol Induced Dimentia. With that covered, I would like to add that all physcological drugs that are prescribed to adults have a vast array of side effects. The 'dry mouth' and the 'irritability or sleeplessness' is the lighter of more than 30 or so effects. Teens are reported to have an adverse effect and a significant percentage based on which physcological drug they take makes them prone to suicidal thoughts and tendancies. In some cases it will backfire and deepen their depression or anger.
The Doctor diagnosed the 15 year old as having 'Oppositional Defiant Disorder'. She had a history of being a runaway six or seven times, being violent, assaulting parents, teachers, and other family members, using illegal drugs and being defiant is everyway. The only time she was not defiant was when she believed she had the potential to recieve money or get her way through manipulation without having to go to drastic measures. She was spoiled beyond belief and I watched this rollercoaster of hell for over 5 years. Her mother was in and out of jail constantly and repetitively dissappointed and lied to her. In some ways, I did feel a measure of sympathy for her. However, to tie this into the debate, the Doctor diagnosed her and reccommended BiPolar medications. I do not believe that Science has now given a name to the "I want to do whatever the f*k I want" syndrome. She would not listen to anyone, and when she feared the arms of the Legal System suggesting to place her in a foster home within minutes she had already adjusted herself into a more serious tone. She instantaneously became pleasant with the case worker and cooperative. She was like this for over 2 weeks straight until she realized she would not get what she wanted out of it. She had to remain home and obey curfew and once she realized the caseworker was not going to assume she was always telling the truth and take her side over me, the parent, she went right back to defiant and dangerous and spoiled.
Not all children need to be pumped with drugs inorder for them to function the way we want and to have society accept them. Somewhere down the line I believe that someone had the 'Eureka' ephiffany and realized that badly behaved children could be doped up into an acceptable balanced behavior. Mind you, it is a profitable business to the Drug companies and the Doctors. Not every behavior needs to be listed as a symptom for some type of disorder.
Most defiant behaviors should not be considered a symptom. Take it for what it is. If your unruly teen daughter says "I hate you! You are ruining my life! I can't believe you wont lend me the car. I never do anything! You are so controlling..." and so on, does not mean you are controlling nor does it indicate a mental disorder. It means she is pissed off and mad that you wont lend her something of yours that is a privilige to use and she assumes is a right just because she is her wonderful self and doesn't have to earn it." Most teens now act as if we owe them something or as if our money we earn working hard needs to be spent in ways they require. It was not like this in the 1950's. I would not dare tell my father to 'shut up'
or demand that he pamper me with undeserved priviliges. They act like we owe them something and some parents give in. In that case, whose fault is it? If you coddle a baby and never spank them or correct them, can you blame them at the age of 16 for screaming or breaking your stuff. If you dont 'train' your kids, they 'train' you, to be a DOORMAT that is.
When deciding whether your teen has an attitude problem or a disorder, I always reccommend an evaluation. There are some symptoms that a person with average education would never consider strange enough to be considered a symptom. There are also some disorders that are linked to heredity. So, get an evaluation and then a second opinion. It also helps to monitor their behavior based on stress, dissapointment, unsatisfactory results of your decisions ie: you saying 'no' to a request, and a few other things. You can decide if certain things trigger the actions such as swearing, screaming, depression, violence ect. If you have a lot to note on it, than that leans toward a behavioral and not mental disorder. Be open with the counselor or physcologist and be prepared if they truly do make a diagnosis of mental disorder. I can say that our children are brats and not Bipolar. If they truly were, I would be open to any help I could get for them and they would deserve every ounce of my effort to give them a reasonable normal life through meds if necessary.
Other options that do not include drugs, boot camp, counseling, stress relief or anger management classes, trying to spend more individual time with them outside of a entire family outing, taking up a hobby with them. Another option that I have tried without real success, is to evaluate the house rules in front of them and get an idea on which ones they keep breaking and why. Most of the time, at the time of the incident if you ask right then and there like at midnight "where have you been the last two hours? You broke Curfew 2 hours ago! We discussed this multiple times" your going to get a bullshit answer from them. So wait a while, and ask again. Consider Agencies like the "Women and Children's Youth Services" or other Government Agencies for questions or refferals for information on any part of this topic.
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