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| Yes | 95% | 465 votes | Total: 489 votes | |
| No | 5% | 24 votes |
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Add to FavoritesThe right to choose funeral rites providing the person is mentally competent should be the choice of the dying person. Family should be supportive of this and make sure where possible the rites of the dying person is honored. There may be cultural traditions, which require the person to relate their last wishes what needs to be done. In addition, there are healthy people who I have known that made their own arrangements as a result of not having anyone to make preparations for them. When we make those final decisions, we should be making sure it's documented and family and friends are aware of what the dying person's wishes are.
There are so many do it yourself "Wills, Power of Attorneys" packages one can find at the local bookstore or consult an attorney for further advice. It is important to make sure their last rites are complied with as it provides them better peace of mind in their last days. The worst thing for the dying person is that they are not sure whether or not their rites will be enforced and so it's important to make it as easier as possible for the person to die with some comfort and to know they will be taken care of.
Furthermore, it's important for the dying person to make financial provisions in order to have their rites met. In most cases money is the important factor in this situation due to the fact that funerals have become so commercialized and a business it is necessary then to make such provisions to assist the family with the rites of the dead. In some cases the rites are not able to be complied with because of other financial obligations to the family. This is why it's important to finalize and do the Wills, and other insurance and benefits revisions so we will be able to have our wishes.
My father who passed away in 1998 of cancer, he always told me when he died he would like to be cremated and his ashes scattered over the ocean. Also I know for certain the other alternative was to be buried in his motherland and not a foreign country. However due to life's circumstances, he lived in Florida for the last of his days and was buried there. He was never cremated nor was there any attempt to take his body back and bury it where he was originally born in the cemetery where his parents were also buried. I understood the reasons why, my mother is elderly and financially it was not possible to do so however I thought the least that would happen, he would have been cremated. This was not possible because you see my family's beliefs follow the Islamic doctrine and according to the religion Muslims do not believe in being cremated.
Although my father stated he was an atheist he was also an environmentalist and his belief was what I called a logical and practical one. He believed traditional burials takes up so much space/land and so the better thing for the environment is to be cremated and scattered, that way the ashes goes back to the earth, which he believes replenishes the earth in energy form. In addition to be cremated, he always said if he should die from a disease he would have wanted his body donated to science for studies which would contribute to the forum of medicine.
The problem with my father, he didn't write down his wishes to my knowledge but the probability of his wishes being granted even if they were written down was not possible due to the fact my family is deeply involved with their Islamic traditions, which takes precedent over the rites of a personal wish.
In my perspective I believe what Karl Marx once said that religion was the "opium of society" and that I truly believe that when we begin to place religion before things which are important to us as individuals we compromise ourselves in something which has been interpreted by what humankind say it should be. I hope my wishes will be granted, and that my rites done the way I would have wanted it to be. In the meantime, I will continue to enjoy the rest of my beautiful life as it continues to unfold.
Learn more about this author, Nadia Ghanny.
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No
A funeral is a time for those still living to remember someone who has died, to celebrate their life, to accept their death, and to grieve and mourn with others who share their loss. It is an important part of the grieving process. A funeral reinforces the fact that the deceased is in fact dead, something that may seem hard to believe for loved ones. It brings together all the people who suffered the loss, so that nobody feels like they are alone. It provides people with a final chance to say goodbye and make their peace. It gives people closure, allowing them to close that chapter of their lives and move on to the next.
The funeral process does not really affect the deceased. For those who believe that death is the end, the deceased is no longer in existence at the time of the funeral so there is no way that any particular rituals will affect them at all. For those who believe the soul continues to exist, the generally accept theory seems to be that the soul leaves the body at the time of death, and therefore the body is no longer attached to the soul at the time of the funeral.
As the funeral is for the benefit of the living, it needs to cater for their needs, and not the needs of the deceased. The funeral should include rituals that help the living to come to terms with the death. The rituals should reflect the believes and feelings of those attending the funeral.
If the deceased wished for something particular to be included in their funeral, it would probably be comforting to their family and friends to include it in the service. However if the wishes of the deceased clash with the beliefs and needs of those attending the funeral, it could cause the attendees to feel uncomfortable or upset, which is not something I believe should be done.
If I were to consider my own funeral, I would like to picture my family and friends celebrating my life, reliving their memories and enjoying themselves together. In reality, they are far more likely to be upset and tearful, hardly in the mood for a celebration. It would be extremely uncomfortable for me to try to enjoy myself if someone close to me had passed away, and I wouldn't wish to make my family and friends uncomfortable by trying to force them to make my funeral a celebration.
If the beliefs of the deceased differ from those of their family and friends, the type of funeral that they picture may not satisfy the needs of their loved ones, and it would be selfish to exclude rituals which are important to those attending just because they don't match the beliefs of the deceased. For example, if an atheist wished to have no religious content in their funeral, but their relatives held religious beliefs that require certain rituals to be performed, the deceased would be denying their relatives the peace of mind which those rituals could bring.
I do think that the wishes of the deceased should be considered when planning their funeral, because it is likely that complying with their wishes will make their loved ones feel more comfortable, but I don't think that they should have the final word, given that the funeral is not for their benefit. It is more important that the living be allowed to grieve in their own ways than it is to follow the wishes of somebody who is no longer there to benefit from them.
Learn more about this author, Kate Hudson.
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